Poogona [he/him]

  • 11 Posts
  • 633 Comments
Joined 4 years ago
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Cake day: October 12th, 2021

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  • earnestpost for you

    As someone who is probably the equivalent of this friend of yours to someone I know, patience is key

    If they had said “I think you are a kind and sensitive soul and I want to be closer” to me when I was in a particularly deep pit of self-loathing, I would appreciate it at first but also be seismically rocked to my core by such a show of love, love being something that I had temporarily lost the emotional literacy to understand and properly digest. I would have said “I have tricked this person, I have done them a disservice with misleading advertisement.” It’s mean, frankly, because it underestimates their judgement, but self-loathing is all about being mean. Very “anyone who falls for my bullshit is a sucker and I can’t respect a sucker.”

    BUT–I have crossed the Gulf, I’m a love conduit now, and if they said it to me today I’d probably weep but certainly reciprocate. All it took was time, maybe your friend will eventually soak up enough drip-fed niceness to ripen like I did, maybe it just needs time.















  • If the goal is to get it out of my system like you describe, I don’t do anything I’d describe as prep, rather I set it up like a special occasion. “Writing time” then becomes mixed up with some kind of lil treat, to separate my satisfaction with the writing done from the time spent. This way, even if the writing itself fell flat and I’m disappointed, maybe I still had a a nice time.

    Since writing is often a matter of habit once the initial enthusiasm wears off (for longer stuff at least, not like poetry), my best success came from writing being the gravitic center of my day. It needed to be easy to start, and hard to quit early.