• avalokitesha
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    10 months ago

    You are just bringing examples where insecure people who struggle with social skills (hi, nice to meet you) would not be able to handle it.

    You kinda completely blazed past my point while confirming it. Clearly for you rules light is great. I’m trying to tell you there’s people who are not you and who need more rules to even dare to try.

    • cyberdecker@beehaw.org
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      10 months ago

      insecure people who struggle with social skills

      Hi, also me. Nice to meet you.

      This is why I run “rules-light” systems and why you won’t find me running (or playing, anymore) games like DND. The complexity of rules is just too much for me to remember and memorize. I don’t have it in me to argue and debate about applying a rule and would prefer not to interact with someone who is rules lawyering. I find that having those rules there is more intimidating to me than anything else. I feel like I have to work with rules first and then find ways to be an agent of my character within that.

      Because of my own insecurities, I tend to lean on systems that require more collaboration, discussion and openness. I can’t really be wrong if we have collectively decided on a choice about our story. And even in that, calling it, our story carries so much power and lifts a huge weight off of my shoulders in terms of pressure for both playing and running a game. This is how I can skirt around my own insecurities and work with the kind of social skills that I have and prefer to use. I want collaborators rather than adversaries since that is socially much safer. Consequently, this also leads to very rich storytelling.

        • cyberdecker@beehaw.org
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          10 months ago

          It’s taken a while to find “my people.” I try to surround myself with good people both ocially and professionally. And the kind of people I like to be around tend to be good discussion partners and usually make great collaborators and storytellers. I hope you can find your people someday too! Keep looking, they are out there.

    • InsurgentRat@beehaw.org
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      10 months ago

      But I’m an insecure person. I speak maybe 100 words aloud a week outside of gaming.

      It’s not easy to enforce rules without confience, much easier to build consensus than be a dictator

      • avalokitesha
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        10 months ago

        The easiest way is to say “this is the rules as written, deal with it, we don’t do homebrew here” for me. The people I met in game spaces where not the type to reach a consensus quickly. I guess I’ve just been unlucky.