• Erika3sis [she/her, xe/xem]@hexbear.net
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      9 months ago

      New theory: every single person who attends a right-libertarian event is actually a pit stank fetishist who wants to be discrete about their whole thing, and, knowing that right-libertarians are supposed to be the monarchs of malodorousness, has decided to completely fabricate an interest in those politics in order to get their fix. Nobody at these events knows that everybody else is there for the exact same reason that they are, and so they’re all just sort of keeping up the act.

      One thinks, “Uhh… Libertarians like… SJW cringe compilations, don’t they?”, and so he promptly proposes, “Uhhh, hey, guys, don’t we want to laugh at some, uhh, SJWs? To own the libs and stuff like that or whatever?”

      The rest collectively think, “I’m supposed to like that stuff, right? Besides, watching this means that I don’t have to actually say anything meaningful about all this nonsense that doesn’t even make any sense.”, and so everybody enthusiastically nods, and thus it begins.

      And so they all spend several hours just watching SJW cringe compilations. The one sometimes notices that everybody including himself has the face of someone being socially obligated to eat rock soup while complimenting the chef, and asks, “Do you guys want to continue or should we… do something else for a while?”, and nobody has any other ideas that wouldn’t out them, and so they all just sorta go, “Uhm, it’s, uh, it’s up to you.” – “I’m fine with continuing, personally.” – and so they continue.

      Sometimes they start getting suspicious of each other, but none of them know what a real libertarian is supposed to act like anyways, and their social skills are just developed enough to know that they can’t just out and ask such an embarrassing personal question, and so they just keep up the act literally from day to dawn.

      But hey, the pit stank was to die for, so all in all it could’ve gone a lot worse.