Yeah, I was in therapy at 27 for my ADHD, which was diagnosed fifteen years earlier, when I learned how to make an ADHD-friendly to-do list.
In those fifteen years I never thought “maybe to-do lists are so frequently recommended because they’re actually valuable” and no other therapists or mentors had thought that I might not know that to-do lists for people with ADHD are different from the ones that work for neurotypical people (my list doesn’t say “wash dishes,” it says “collect dishes from the bedroom and kitchen, soak silverware in a pot with hot water, stack plates next to the sink, soak any cookware or cups that need it, wash plates and bowls, wash silverware, wash cups, wash cookware”).
It’s so obvious in hindsight, but I felt almost condescended to when people told me to write a to-do list. Finding out not only were they right, but I need a to-do list that’s broken down into smaller steps than normal was humbling in a good way. I hope I’m less dismissive of seemingly basic ideas now.
I think if someone had seen my therapist’s notes to me and made fun of them, I might not have been able to be open to their advice. Or maybe I’d just be embarrassed about the experience, instead of grateful.
Yeah, I was in therapy at 27 for my ADHD, which was diagnosed fifteen years earlier, when I learned how to make an ADHD-friendly to-do list.
In those fifteen years I never thought “maybe to-do lists are so frequently recommended because they’re actually valuable” and no other therapists or mentors had thought that I might not know that to-do lists for people with ADHD are different from the ones that work for neurotypical people (my list doesn’t say “wash dishes,” it says “collect dishes from the bedroom and kitchen, soak silverware in a pot with hot water, stack plates next to the sink, soak any cookware or cups that need it, wash plates and bowls, wash silverware, wash cups, wash cookware”).
It’s so obvious in hindsight, but I felt almost condescended to when people told me to write a to-do list. Finding out not only were they right, but I need a to-do list that’s broken down into smaller steps than normal was humbling in a good way. I hope I’m less dismissive of seemingly basic ideas now.
I think if someone had seen my therapist’s notes to me and made fun of them, I might not have been able to be open to their advice. Or maybe I’d just be embarrassed about the experience, instead of grateful.