It’s a reference to a game, but what I mean by it is being critical and considering different sides on an issue / not just accepting a ready given answer. Thinking out of the box as well.

We might have for example discussed something like personal responsibility and I likely would have asked him to consider the structural reasons someone might behave a certain way and question how much choice there actually is in it. Like hating ones bullies is easy, but understanding why they do it is harder. Not saying anger isn’t ok, but I would typically talk with him about the possible whys of things as well. We did talk a lot and do.

I agree it has made us all freer, I owe a lot to him on how much better I personally cope with the world now. Not to mention his dad who has been able to purge himself from a lot of gender spesific toxicity as our son has modelled a better way to be to him with confidence. We also have a trans kid (stepkid to me) and have to say that these people have made us two gen X wrecks so much better and freer.