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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • I don’t know about loser but I do think you’re setting yourself for an unpleasant wake-up at some point.

    Spend your youth jerking it, playing video games and never going through the learnings, experiences, joys and heartbreaks of relationships, if you realize in a dozen years that there is a gaping partner/meaning/joy void in your life, it’ll be much harder to fix. Believe me, dating does not get easier in middle age. Especially if you don’t want kids.

    It’s sort of like any other drug, easy and appealing alternative to life’s difficulties in the moment but consistent use tends to lead to serious problems down the road.

    That being said, if you’re 26 and haven’t been on a date, I imagine there are bigger issues than a preference for video games and waifus. I suspect the women with whom you have a chance aren’t attractive enough for you so it leads to this spiral. And frankly, lowering your standards sucks and lifting yourself up to meet others’ standards is a lot of work.

    Don’t really have an answer but those are my middle aged thoughts. I’m old, balding, don’t want kids and haven’t seriously dated for a couple of years as I’m adjusting to this new reality. But goddamn I am happy I spent my late 20s sleeping with a lot of fun folks and in a few meaningful relationships. I grew every time I fell in love, cherish some of the crazy times and know I’m a better person for it all. Those experiences and memories are big motivators for getting into better shape, working on myself etc so that when I’m ready, I can aim for another of those awesome fun relationships.






  • I think you’ve got most of it pretty well outlined here. A couple minor additions/thoughts:

    Lemmys communist leanings are probably self reinforcing. If you’re a moderate/mainstream leftie but think communism is a but silly, well noting so will get you “yelled at” by those disproportionately loud voices. It gets tiring, so I imagine the mainstream/moderates learn to avoid communism adjacent threads/questions etc.

    There also may be an age thing. I have less time and inclination to argue with randoms online than when I was younger. And when I was younger I had much more extreme (and in retrospect some embarrassing) views.




  • “Ha, these two were deeply in love and had a marriage stronger than money! What losers!” Fairly hard to make the claim the joke is at their expense.

    This might be a language thing though? The phrase at their expense tends to mean that whomever is the butt of the joke. In this case, the four audience marriages are the butt of the joke as they are not as in love as the deceased.

    I don’t know if you’re old enough to have spoken at funerals. There are jokes you tell while doing so, usually framed like this wherein you’re praising the deceased (usually a common memory, like their cooking) and comparing yourself or the crowd unfavourably.

    Now, I’m not sure it was appropriate or wise for trump to try this at a fundraiser but it seems disingenuous to say he was making fun of the deceased, which is how most English readers would interpret the headline.





  • Deciding that nothing happened or is happening is pretty damned privileged in my opinion.

    A good friend and her toddler needed public transit the other week and had to deal with a guy smoking hard drugs at the bus stop who, after boarding the bus and started yelling gay slurs at someone. Is she ever going to be okay putting her kid on public transit alone? Or will she need to take extra time off work to escort her kid everywhere? Or work extra to afford to uber the kid to everything? Or just not leave?

    That’s a pretty sketchy but not entirely unusual occurrence here in Vancouver. My heart bleeds for those struggling but that also includes those who need to walk downtown, those who are vulnerable (more than a few girls I know are worried, with good reason, if they have to leave their places alone at night) or the small business owners who’ve given up after replacing their glass windows for the third time in a month. As a reasonable sized dude, I’m fine kind of wherever but I think it’s essential to remember that empathy goes both ways.




  • Hate trump but I think RawStory is misrepresenting this as they do much else.

    Here is the reporting for the Guardian, a mpre legitimate source of news:

    Then, recalling a meeting with Comperatore’s widow, Helen, he made a risky attempt to find humour in the tragedy. “So they’re going to get millions of dollars but the woman, the wife, this beautiful woman, I handed her the cheque – we handed her the cheque – and she said, ‘This is so nice, and I appreciate it, but I’d much rather have my husband.’ Now, I know some of the women in this room wouldn’t say the same.”

    As dinner guests erupted in laughter, Trump quipped: “I know at least four couples. There are four couples, Governor [Abbott], that I know and you’re not one of them. At least four couples here would have been thrilled, actually.”