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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: June 2nd, 2023

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  • As a child, I wanted to be a zoologist.

    Later during my teens I wanted to be an artist. And I did.

    I pursued the arts for a very long time. Started as a silversmith while I was still in my teens, a career that lasted about 15 years give or take. Meanwhile I kept studying arts. I managed to get some illustrations published but it wasn’t a lot. As my silversmith era was ending, I got into 3D design/VFX. I managed to work for a small studio for two years. Best job in my whole life, unfortunately it ended too roughly with a mix of industry collapse, burnout and personal relationship problems all entangled.

    That was a couple years ago and in spite of my best efforts I couldn’t get a job in 3D ever again. This in turn drove me into depression, of which I’m crawling out of, currently holding a job in retail ( I jumped from one retail place to another until I found a decent work environment) but unfortunately my creative side is not giving any signs of life. The current AI debacle adds insult to injury, discouraging sharing new work at all if I had anything substantial to produce.

    It’s shit. But it used to be great. I wonder if there’s something of Phoenix in me or if I’m just a pile of ashes. Only time will tell but the years keep piling up and things don’t improve.











  • Okay the key here is what you mean by “constantly”. Telling a story about something so life changing once a year hardly goes as “constantly” in my books.

    What may come across as manipulative is you mentioning she’s trying to get you to do as she says or trying to get guilt or compassion from you. And this with a pinch of salt, because it’s very hard to tell from what you share here. I would have to become a fly on your wall for a long time to have my own opinion about it.

    You tell me she’s telling you this every week and making reference to it every day, several times a day, and now that’s what I consider “constantly”. That she hardly has anything else to share about her past or that she somehow finds a way to spin everything to a framework of scarred pregnancy mother, or similar.

    My own mother has told me about her pregnancies several times a year, I heard her stories so many times. Hundreds. Yet that was never the only story she had, and it was always brought up more or less naturally in conversation. The same happened with several other favorite anecdotes of her own past and me and my sister’s childhood. I would consider this aspect to be normal.

    I never felt manipulated by her retelling of a story though. And I know she could manipulate pretty well. She also had a few topics she would constantly harass me about, yes, daily or nearly to a point. But retelling the past was not part of it, even though she did frequently.