• 1 Post
Joined 1 year ago
Cake day: June 19th, 2023


  • In this post I have been using that term “non-speaking episodes” because it factually describes what is happening. Some people suggest “autistic shutdown” which is common in the community.

    I am not arguing we should use non verbal but autistic shutdown is way to general because for me being (temporarily) unable to speak is only one of the first syptoms. It feels like a litteral “loss of words” since in those situations I’m unable to translate my thoughts into words.

  • When I have a mild headache, usually from a stiff neck, it impacts me like any other mild pain. It is just a source of stress, like children screaming near by or a Light flickering. It lowers my concentration and my mental capacity but unless there are other factors I can still somewhat function at least for a time.

    Migraine is something different all together for me typically it starts with flickering in the center of my vision. Usually I recognize it because it gets hard to read text. The flickering then spreads out and slowly moves to my peripheral vision over about 10 to 30 minutes. When it moves out of my field of vision it takes another 10 to 30 minutes until my brain feels like a bucket of snails. I can’t concentrate even on interesting things and even simple thoughts take effort. About a third of the time a really bad headache starts at the same time. The headache usually lasts about 1 to 3 hours but feels like 10. The sluggishness and fuzziness of my brain will slowly fade over the next one to three days.

    This seems to be called migraine with aura. Luckily it hits me only about 3-5 times a year.

  • I’m quite useless for at least the first one and a half hours after waking up. My strategy is ritualization. In this time I do the same things in the same order every working day: I get up, make breakfast for our cat, take my meds, switch on the coffee machine so it can heat up, shower, shave, brush my teeth, dress, emty the dish washer, make coffee for my self and (if she is already awake) one for my wife. Then pack my lunch, grab my headphones and go to the bus stop. All those things I can do with minimal brain capacity since I have done them the same way thousands of times. And when I arrive at work I’m at least 80% awake.

  • I don’t consider ADHD a superpower and I struggle with executive dysfunction every single day. I would love to be able to understand other people and their non verbal or indirect communication better. On the other hand I love the fact that my personal combination of disabilities has allowed me to learn to extremely quickly research enough of any given topic to have relevant discussions with experts. My widespread intereste allowed me to learn a huge variety of facts most of which are useless most of the time but many of which were surprisingly useful at least one time in my life. My bad working memory forced me to learn to use general principles to get useful results based on very little information and to quickly distill the most relevant information out of heaps of text. Nearly every single strenght I have is literally the flip-side of one of my weaknesses. On the whole I would say that while my ADHD and ASD have clearly made my life more challenging on the whole those challenges helped me become the person I am. I recognize that not everyone is as lucky as I am in that regard but i"m quite sure there are others who are even more lucky than me many of which won’t even suspect they are neurodivergent, just as I didn’t a few years ago. So I think your perception of the “objective” ammount of neurodivergent suffering may be squewed because only people who suffer at least a bit have reason to get a diagnosis.

    • I am autistic and have ADHD and I still prefer having been born to the alternative thank you very much!
    • Comparing the intentional breeding of universaly harmful traits in dogs to taking a slightly higher risk of ASD which is rarely harmful is quite a stretch.
    • Without autistic people many great things wouldn’t exist today. I would argue that without the special interests and hyperfocus of neurodiverse people a lot of scientce and engineering wouldn’t have happened or at least a lot later.
    • While ASD and ADHD are often percieved as harmful, they are rarely only harmful and often bring special talent or at least a unique perspective.