• Tartas1995
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    2 days ago

    I am also very supportive of women’s rights but lying is not helpful.

    Honestly the point that it tries to make is not the point that it makes either. It could be understood as “let’s ban abortion everywhere”, and I don’t think that is the point that it tries to make.

    I am in favor of bodily autonomy and I don’t care what the law currently is anywhere, it should be a given.

    • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
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      4 hours ago

      The irony is that the issue they’re talking about involves women losing, in some states, rights that men have never had in any state; men have zero legal means of opting out of parenthood, full stop.

      If this was about women losing something that men aren’t already without, they might have the foundation of a point. But it’s still a fact that women haven’t really given a shit about advocating for giving men the equivalent rights, throughout the decades that they had it nationwide.

    • DomeGuy@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I am also very supportive of women’s rights but lying is not helpful.

      Worth knowing: although they attract a lot of anti-feminist losers, the “men’s rights” activists are absolutely correct that men do not universally have the same support programs or even legal presumptions that women do. These can vary widely from state to state and even from court to court.

      It’s not nearly as big an issue as “they want her to die from a miscarriage”, but “they presume he’s the inferior parent” or “they presume he caused the violence even if he’s the one bleeding” are also sexist oppression.

      (Comparisons to the anti-woke “all lives matter” bullshit are apt – men can and should recognize that relatively minor slights and injustices are not nearly as urgent as denying pregnant humans life-saving care!)

      • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
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        4 hours ago

        The simple fact is that the right to legally opt out of parenthood is something men have never had. Ironically, women losing some of those rights (there is still adoption and legal abandonment, the other 2 of the 'three A’s) in some places, brings them closer to where men are, re reproductive rights.

      • Pelicanen@sopuli.xyz
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        1 day ago

        To be fair, the vast majority of these are societal standards and not rights, they are still absolutely important and we need to do more for equality both for women and for men, but strictly speaking they are not by definition rights.

        But I am in agreement with you that I think a lot of why the younger generation are being pulled in the wrong direction is because men, of which I am one, have not done enough to create an environment that addresses issues that primarily affects men in a way that is not based on misogyny.

        Don’t get me wrong, the alt-right have absolutely tried to exacerbate these issues (either knowingly or unknowingly) and use them for their own gains, but we as a society have also not prioritized emotionally healthy solutions and that has led us to where we are.

        • DomeGuy@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          I think we have a right to be judged fairly and not because of our gender or sex. But that’s a semantic point and I don’t want to quibble.

          I do want to push back on excusing from women their responsibility for the society we live in, however. (Or just underline an implied point we may both share.)

          Nearly every man I know values the opinions of women at least as much as those of other men. When a boy sees his mom belittle his father for being insufficiently manly, he hears a lesson that sexism is bad. When a man tells a boy that the way to get a girlfriend is to be a sexist jerk the boy listens, not because he cares about the con artist, but because he’s desperate for a girl who cares about him.

          Men have a lot of the big levers of power, and do bear a proportionate share of our own blame, but we shouldn’t excuse women who use the power they have in ways that make our society worse.

          We’re all in this together, and all need to do what we can to make the world we pass to our children better than the one our parents passed on to us.

      • Tartas1995
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        2 days ago

        I would agree and disagree.

        You are right but I think “ignoring” “men’s issues” harms the feministic cause and consequently the “dying of miscarriage” problem. As sad as it is PR is sometimes very important and e.g. the lie in the post doesn’t help the PR and a lot of young men don’t feel supported but attacked by the current framing of feminism.

        • DomeGuy@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          I think we agree and agree.

          I was careful not to use the word “ignore”, because the answer to anyone sharing how they were harmed by sexism should never be anything less than “that’s horrible and I hate that it happened to you.”

          Sexist women who claim to be “feminist” and yet feel free to denigrate men or dismiss their perspective are terrible advocates for the cause.

          (Not “their” cause, because sexism is an evil that harms everyone and everyone should be against it.)

          (And sealions who claim to be “men’s rights activists” but just want to be sexist anti-feminist trolls are at least as bad.)

      • DempstersBox@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        if they assume he’s the inferior parent, why do the men win custody almost every fucking time they try, whereas the woman involved gets the kid dumped on her, completely, with no child support orders unless she fights for them, anytime the guy doesn’t want anything to do with the kid he knocked her up with?

        • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
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          4 hours ago

          why do the men win custody almost every fucking time they try

          I know where you’re getting this from. Just so you know, it comes from a deliberately misleading interpretation of “winning custody”, where if a man seeks any amount of custody, and is granted anything more than nothing at all, it’s ‘counted’ by those spreading this propaganda, a “win”. This is as opposed to what any reasonable person would call a “win”, which is when one gets at least as much custody as one seeks. That’s like calling me a “lottery winner” because I won $5 after spending $1000 on tickets, lol.

          If the mother of my child is abusive and I try to get full custody, but the judge gives me every other week supervised visitation, that is obviously not a “win”, but it is, by the definition of the misandrists who propagated that particular piece of bullshit around.

        • DomeGuy@lemmy.world
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          8 hours ago

          Like i said, the issue varys wildly by state or court.

          Although part of the reason why men who ask for custody get it more than 50% of the time is that very often they know (or believe) they don’t have a chance and so don’t fight.