I feel the need to say beforehand, I’m slightly drunk right now, and my inhibitions are lowered by this, but this has been bothering me lately.
I don’t know of I need some kind of help. I’ve kind of become enamored with a “slutty, bimbo” look for myself, wearing really short booty shorts and really short crop tops, and wanting to adopt a “slutty” lifestyle. I’ve always liked the idea of being indiscriminate of my partners. I want to say, though, I can’t right now, since she left.
Depressing thoughts aside, should I talk to my therapist about this? I don’t want to end up using sex to cope with my mental deficiencies, but, my mind is equating what I’ve always wanted in a partner is what I’ve really wanted for myself.
I’m ashamed of being slut-shamed, or my kids seeing me with multiple sexual partners. I know it is too early to think about sex, but I’m really self conscious about my innate desire to dress and be slutty. I’m sorry if I’m oversharing, but I don’t know what to do with this part of myself.
Definitely talk with your therapist about these feelings.
I think we all go through a “slutty” stage in dress or actions after spending so much time trying to repress and hide it our true selves. It’s kinda like making up for missed opportunities and Finding ourselves.
It’s just, if you made a Venn Diagram of a year ago me objectively describing physical attributes I found hot in a woman, and my transition goals, I think it would just be a circle. I want long blonde hair, sky blue nails, not afraid to show off her body. I keep calling it sluttiness, but, it’s probably just confidence. Confidence is sexy after all. Confidence in myself and my body, to think I’m hot shit. Not in a condescending way, mind you. I’ve been talked down to enough to know how it feels.