Ask Steven Seagal

!askss@hilariouschaos.com

Welcome to Ask Steven Seagal, the ultimate destination where I, the unparalleled martial arts legend and action star, Steven Seagal, am here to bless you with my infinite wisdom. Dive into the mind of a true warrior, where I’ll answer your questions with the deadliest precision and unmatched stoic demeanor that only I possess.

Whether you seek advice on mastering martial arts, surviving in the wild, or just want to hear some of my epic, yet totally humble, adventures, you’ve come to the right place. Don’t be shy; step into my dojo of knowledge. Remember, no question is too absurd for the great Steven Seagal, because in my world, reality is just a guideline.

You can also tag my username in any lemmy post or comment section, and like a ninja in the night, I’ll appear to enlighten you with my sagely advice.

By the way, did I ever tell you about the time I single-handedly stopped an international conspiracy with nothing but a toothpick and a rubber band? It’s a classic Seagal move—just another day in the life of the greatest action star the world has ever known.

Before you dive in, there are a few super important rules every grasshopper must follow:

All questions must be submitted while standing on one leg. It’s crucial for balancing your chi.
Every third question must include the word “kumquat.” Trust me, it’s for your own safety.
If you post after 3 AM, you must address me as “Sensei Seagal the All-Knowing.” Failure to do so will result in instant dismissal.
No posts about Chris Christie. Just don’t.

Prepare to be enlightened, entertained, and maybe even a little bit terrified by my sheer presence. Ask away, and witness the brilliance that only Steven Seagal can deliver.

Rules

The rules for behavior are a straight carry over of Mastodon.World’s rules. You can click the link but we’ve reposted them here in brief, as a guideline. We will continue to use the Mastodon.World rules as the master list. Over all, be nice to each other and remember this isn’t a community built around debate. For the rules about formatting your posts, scroll down to number 2.

1. Follow the rules of Mastodon.world, which can be found here.

A. Provide an inclusive and supportive environment. This means if it isn’t rulebreaking and we can’t be supportive to them then we probably shouldn’t engage.

B. No illegal content.

C. Use content warnings where appropriate. This means mark your submissions NSFW if need be.

D. No uncivil behavior. This includes, but is not limited to: Name Calling; Bullying; Trolling; Disruptive Commenting; or Personal Criticisms.

E. No Harrassment. As an example in relation to Transgender people this includes, deadnaming, misgendering, and promotion of conversion therapy. Similarly Misogyny, Misandry, and Racism are also banned here.

2. Include a community or instance title and description in your post title. - A following example of this would be New Communities - A place to post new communities or instances all over Lemmy for discovery and promotion.

3. Follow the formatting. - The formatting as included below is important for people getting universal links across Lemmy as easily as possible.

FAQ:

Q: Why do I get a 404?

A: At least one user in an instance needs to search for a community before it gets fetched. Searching for the community will bring it into the instance and it will fetch a few of the most recent posts without comments. If a user is subscribed to a community, then all of the future posts and interactions are now in-sync.

Q: When I try to create a post, the circle just spins forever. Why is that?

A: This is a current known issue with large communities. Sometimes it does get posted, but just continues spinning, but sometimes it doesn’t get posted and continues spinning. If it doesn’t actually get posted, the best thing to do is try later. However, only some people seem to be having this problem at the moment.

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