Remember, EM POC only!
This message is to my EM POC comrades: Angel loves all of you.
Especially as of late, I have truly been feeling like this community has worked wonders in keeping me stable when it comes to handling the massive jar of mayo that this site can be sometimes.
How are you all?
Interesting research findings
AFAIK immigrants are less likely to commit crimes because they are afraid of harsher consequences, especially if they’re undocumented. It doesn’t stop the pigs from harassing them more frequently, however.
Xenophobia is completely unfounded and whitey just wants to hurt people.
Something about Amerikkkan settlers seeing themselves in immigrants really brings out a rare bit of humanity of the former…
Should I read Settlers or The Invention of The White Race first?
Settlers first, shorter and easier read imo
Not really a “wrong” order though
I want to join the Black community group at work but one of the future events is about black folks in the military and it turned me off. Maybe I should join anyway to bring the revolutionary energy that’s needed.
Tovarshi, why not both? Timetable troubles?
I felt like a minority amongst the minorities 😭. Like, they felt like the fraternity/sorority Hilary banks type
Oh no, not the HBCU greeks
If there’s anything my time in the workforce taught me it’s that you can’t trust anybody who still wears an Alpha Kappa or Alpha Phi pin years out from attendance of a Divine Nine; they’ll pitch you under the first bus that profits them to go by
Yeah, solidarity with yer loneliness, I feel ye
yall plz send me good energy… just got a call for a prospective music teaching job i applied to a whileee ago out of state that is more than 3x the pay of my old one!! this could be what i need to get out of this place again and for good this time. they hit me with the “we’ll hit you back in a couple of weeks” at the end and i h8 not knowing exactly when to expect a response (especially cuz i sounded hella awkward on the phone) but i’m using this as an opportunity to continue cultivating my practice of non-attachment. if it is it is, and if it isn’t it isn’t
(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*.✧
Good LUCK ! You can do it > sending positive energy
Hello my friends
I’m eastern european who sadly ended up in the ukkk, so I’m posting here to say hello. I’m very aware that I don’t really experience racism like a lot of my comrades here, so I won’t take up too much space mouthing off, unless I’ve got something to share in the replies or need to scream about some xenophobic bullshit, hope that’s cool.
Sending love to all my em poc comrades
yall are the EM in em poc, if you experience structural racism or your people have been pogromed/ ethnically cleansed and that shit still affects you this is a place for you. if your life experience is indistinguishable from the ethnic group at the top of the hierarchy in which you live this is not the space for you. also you must be mindful not to talk over poc!
Ummm,I honestly thought we weren’t allowed here lmao
I’m kinda replying here because I am only surprised to see this
That’s why I usually avoid this comm,btw if the rule applies to us too, please remove this comment
yall are the EM in em poc, if you experience structural racism or your people have been pogromed/ ethnically cleansed and that shit still affects you this is a place for you. if your life experience is indistinguishable from the ethnic group at the top of the hierarchy in which you live this is not the space for you.
also you must be mindful not to talk over poc!
It is the “ethnic minorities” comm. Eastern Europeans may not experience colorism and whatnot, but they are often excluded from whiteness.
Again, this just shows how arbitrary whiteness is. It’s not about defining specifics. It’s about excluding the other.
IMO Eastern Europeans probably fit the comm so long as they don’t try and pull the ladder up behind them. But it is ultimately up to the mods and I’m half cracker so I could be out of line.
Also, are there any Roma/travelers here on Hexbear? I don’t think I’ve seen them if there are.
But it is ultimately up to the mods and I’m half cracker so I could be out of line.
Great, then yer an ethnic minority: a Hapa!
I also thought yall werent allowed here
If I’m getting the sidebar right, then I think it would be different if I was living in my own country, but I’m in england and english people really don’t need much prompting to start acting like chuds. I definitely don’t get shit for my looks (unless it’s about me being trans) like a lot of people in this mega would, which is obv a huge privilege. But the moment I need to introduce myself with my name I can see the xenophobe gears turning in most ppl here >.> Finding a job sucks for the same reason
I passed the ELDT
which basically means I have satisfied the minimum FMCSA requirement to start the commercial skills test.
I also backed up a bus three times today and didn’t hit any cones or encroach the boundary lines!
Woo!
NICEEEEEEEEE
ayy nice
I “acquired” a ton of E-books on game development from a friends thumbdrive. I hope to crank up my development skills and abilities over the next several months. Not sure what it is but I have noticed my focus and attenion really locked in. In such a way I feel like this time it will be different than my previous attempts at learning this stuff. I wanna game developer and keep it “black black and blackety black yo” in doing so. Even if it’s just a hobby thing I really want to be a game designer, and a black one at that.
That sounds great, I’d appreciate any recs if you don’t mind sharing!
My partner has been nudging me to read “Repairing Play: A Black Phenomenology” by Aaron Trammell for a while, I should really get to it.
“Repairing Play: A Black Phenomenology” is actually in the stash I E-books I got as a matter of fact! Most of the books I have are more technical in-scope but some of them are more on the social side of them. Most of them are games as art sort of books as well as techincal “How to XYZ” sort of books.
Good Luck. We need more black folks in Game development
Big or small, I will work hard and make this is workout.
Spent today in bed, which i bad because i had things i was supposed to do
Like read theory?
Like write papers and code assignments
Got accused of “speaking ynese” and I feel hip and relevant again
working with kids in brooklyn is the only reason i understand half these new terms
What is Ynese?
The dialect spoken by young n****
Oh bliat no!
Today i survived on 2 hours of sleep
but i also ate chinese food which was very good
Today i survived on 2 hours of sleep
Oof
but i also ate chinese food which was very good
Nice… which type?
I feel like a lot of online queer spaces are absolutely overrun with white libs who don’t think that they have the capacity to be racist, despite… constantly being very ignorant and offensive. Really, really weird bubbles. Has anyone else experienced this?? 😭
That’s all marginalized groups that aren’t based on race, unfortunately
Edit: actually not even the ones based on race are immune from thinking they’re above any form of bigotry
like hexbear lol
Somehow, they also end up being shocking degrees of discriminatory within the LGBTQ+ community. Transphobia, enbyphobia, and bi/panphobia are shockingly common in mainstream LGBTQ+ spaces, meaning I’m not talking about those obscure “LGBDroptheT” type forums with a very small base of users.
For sure. I’m remembering all the tweets that used to come up during June that were like “happy pride month to everyone EXCEPT FOR (LGBTQ+ identity that the poster personally hates)” ???
Am I the only person who finds it a little weird when white people start calling other white people cracker (half this site)? Like we can’t even be racist to white people without them stealing that too smh
half this site
Realizing the majority of the newsmega is also just white people…
Oh yes. Its cringe and weird af
They call each other cracker and tell eachother to go back to Europe and shit, it feels like they’re getting the satisfaction of being racist but without the shame of an unacceptable target
Being performative is their culture
And who says white people don’t have culture?
its their way of jacking off about how they are the good enlightened whites. I fucking hate it, its always the people who do the least self crit too, that do it the most, and its more then half the site.
Yeeees, it’s like a competition to them, feels really performative
More than a little
I AM ONCE AGAIN ENCOURAGING PEOPLE TO JOIN EMPOCHA THE ELEMENT HEXBEAR EM POC CHAT ROOM. COME CHAT!!!
Its to late atm. Im gonna check it out tomorrow after work.
My long term relationship that we both thought was for life is imploding right now, and it’s not even because of anything new and recent, it’s because we finally figured out some unhealthy dynamics got set years ago when we were in worse situations in life and dealing with crises and now that we’re looking at it it’s just unbearable. A lot is my fault, some is their’s, but in another way it’s neither of our faults, it’s just an unavoidable tragedy. It’s so depressing to confront how we both were utterly set up to fail in this (or any) relationship by the combined forces of capitalism, systemic racism, and systemic patriarchy. I don’t want this to sound like a cop-out, I don’t want to say “oh my difficulties with emotions and relationships are not my fault because the systems did this to me and I bear no blame,” I can see clearly (now, when it’s too late to prevent them) the mistakes I made. But it’s incredibly frustrating and heartbreaking that when they were happening I couldn’t have done anything else because of how I was malformed by all the trauma of living in the belly of a racist, murderous empire surrounded by toxic hateful racist monsters. At every step of the way we’ve been trying our very best (I’ve been doing therapy for years, and they tried but they just couldn’t find a therapist who wasn’t a capitalist radfem shitlib that would gaslight them and do more harm than good), but at every step for years and years and years the traumas carved into us from early childhood through adulthood sabotaged our efforts. They ask, “why did you do X horrible thing when we needed you to do Z?” and when I examine it it’s genuinely just because of how the racist fabric of America destroyed my family and destroyed me to the point that X was all I was capable of doing in those times of stress. I didn’t get to have a safe environment in which to grow up healthily – I had a fucking nightmare forced upon me when I was just a little kid and it broke me, just more subtly than it broke my other family members. But it broke me nonetheless. I ask them “why did you do Y when we needed you to do Z?” and when they examine it it’s because of how abuse at the hands of the toxic patriarchical fabric of America starting from a very young age carved such deep liabilities and weaknesses into them that they couldn’t be healthier. And then our traumas intersected in bad ways. If just one of us hadn’t had our fatal weaknesses, we could have maybe helped the other. But with both of us having them, our attempts to help each other actually led us to fall into unhealthy dynamics instead and now the traumatic memories of those dynamics make it – I think – impossible to move forward and heal together.
Even with this understanding, even with these big breakthroughs, it may be too late. I think it very likely is even though we desperately want it to not be too late. They said “I don’t want us to have to split up. It would be a horrible tragedy. It should be a simple choice: We love each other and didn’t mean to do harm, now that we understand what went wrong and how the systems did this to us it should be obvious that we just stay together and fix things together. The reason it’s not simple for me is that everything’s been so traumatic I don’t know if it’s possible, healthy, or even ethical for us to try to stay together and fix things together.”
And I get that, I really do. It’s not a cop-out, it’s true. So much traumatic shit has happened that I can’t humanely and ethically ask them to stay. Asking is pointless anyway – they already want to stay and make it better, it’s just a question of whether that’s even possible or healthy for them to try to do, or if too much harm has been done. It’s not a decision to be made, it’s a yes/no fact that has to be uncovered and then whatever that fact is, we’ll have to deal with it even if we hate it.CW bleak, self-harm, despondency, doomerism
I’m so tired of living in the aftermath of being broken by the system. I’m so tired of living with the harms still perpetuating, still ruining my life and destroying any chances I think I have at happiness. I’m tired of causing harm to the people I love — I want to give love, joy, safety, health, and nurturing to my loved ones but instead I’ve brought pain and suffering. I don’t even want to fight back or strike against systemic oppression anymore because I’m so broken and exhausted. To keep going is too painful. Even if now I manage to fix some of the shit that was done to me, it will always have destroyed the most important relationship I’ve ever had and robbed us of our life together. I’ll always have to live in the aftermath of that loss, and the loss will never go away. Every moment I exist hurts too much already and it looks like it’s just going to get worse from here on out. I’ve been through loss and grief enough times before and I know that it doesn’t really get better even with therapy, it just makes the next one worse and the next one after that even worse. I thought I’d escaped that cycle finally; now that I know I haven’t, that I can’t, that this path was set for me before I even hit puberty, I just want to sleep forever. Let me fucking rest. Life is torture and I don’t get why people who say they love me want me to keep being tortured. I have to endure, for now, I have responsibilities and it’s uncertain how things will shake out. My beloved has asked me not to give up and so, on the off chance that somehow things work out, I have to keep going for now. But I see nothing but torment ahead and I resent the loved ones who need me to stay alive for making me suffer the torture of existence instead of finally finding the peace I so desperately need.
What a cruel, pointless life. It’s inhumane to do this to people. It’s inhumane to make kids deal with systemic trauma that just breaks them and turns them into broken adults. I wish my parents hadn’t emigrated to America, but they couldn’t have predicted what the global war on terror would have done. Maybe if they’d stayed in their birth country we’d have been killed by it anyway, though it’s enough on the periphery of the battlegrounds so far that maybe not. Sometimes I think maybe being killed by it would have been preferable to being trapped in this broken life I’ve lived anyway. I look at pictures of me when I was a kid before the cataclysmic harms were done to us, and I look at pictures of me after, and it’s stark how visibly dead inside I’ve been since.
I hope reincarnation is real. This life has been a tragedy and a waste. I want a do-over. I’m incapable of believing in anything so spiritual or metaphysical though so I don’t even get that fiction as solace.
I envy white people here, at least the ones with semi-healthy families (unlike my poor, traumatized partner). For all that there’s something so fucked up and fundamentally wrong with many of those white folks, they seem happier. They have their own traumas to be sure, but they don’t have the trauma that comes from being nonwhite in this KKK society and right now, looking at how that racial trauma has destroyed my life, I envy them for not having been brutalized that way.
It sounds like what you and your partner have is really beautiful, I’m so sorry about everything you’ve gone through.
My partner and I reached this point once before, we broke up and lived separately for a while. I’m so so thankful that we made our way back to each other and now our relationship is stronger than ever. I hope you make it through this time as unscathed as possible, and live long enough to know happiness again. Much love comrade.
Thank you so much. I shouldn’t have checked this at work I’m sobbing right now. I’m so scared and heartbroken. When they told me about the longstanding problems they thought I’d leave them over it, but instead I said I wanted to address all the problems so that we could look back on this as the moment we really turned things around and made our relationship healthier than ever. They said they would like that, but since then it seems they’ve broken too hard to be able to do the work with me. Thanks for giving me a shred of hope that even if we break up now we may be able to reconnect.
you have a very beautiful way of writing and explaining your hurt. I am so deeply sorry for your pain. sending you love and solidarity
Thank you. All my best writing is born out of immense suffering. I wish I didn’t have to suffer so much. I’m so tired
Hi! Comrades! I’m from somewhere in Southeast Asia. I just picked up drawing as a hobby recently because I’ve got more free time from work after those crazy OT periods, still… no overtime means no overtime pay for me, so I’m kinda struggling with money issue now, so I have to use some of my savings to pay bills 😕. Factory job sucks. And wow, can’t believe I’ve been on this instance for 1 year already.
Feels bad for yer financial predicament