• Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    1 year ago

    Sorry I am ignorant and I’m not familiar with the terms. I am trying to learn.

    If a person declares themselves a woman, and they only hook up with men… Are they considered straight?

    To read this: OP considers themself a woman and hook up with women. Is that correct?

    • CoderKat@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      1 year ago

      Yes, that’s correct. One thing that might help you understand is that they’re not merely declaring it, like Michael Scott declaring bankruptcy. Trans people are that gender and they simply either have finally realized it. The default assumption is usually that you simply are your assigned-at-birth gender, so it takes some time for trans people to realize that this assumption was wrong.

      Since they are that gender, it’s easier to see how they would be a straight relationship in your hypothetical, since they’re simply now a woman dating men, which we all label as straight. Such terms look simply at the gender of the people.

      Of course, these days, our understanding of gender is a lot more diverse than it used to be, which makes labels like gay and straight more complex. Eg, non-binary people are on the rise (or more accurately, I suspect knowing how to label it and being out is on the rise). How do you describe a relationship with a non-binary person? It highlights how labels like straight and gay are usually very rough labels.

      • Blahaj_Blast@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        1 year ago

        The issue is that the terms name attraction in relation to the self, rather than just what the attraction is.

        Terms like femmesexual or mascsexual would make way more sense.

        People can transition but what they find attractive can be constant and now you have to change the term for sexuality?

    • wizzwizz4@fosstodon.org
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      1 year ago

      @Potatos_are_not_friends @awesome_person Yeah, that’s right.

      The terminology is confusing, so here’s an easy way to remember it: List all men in one column, and all women in another column. If you can draw a relationship diagram using only straight lines between the columns, the relationship is “straight”; otherwise, it is probably gay.

      (NB: a relationship being “straight” does not imply that the relationship’s participants are straight.)

      • wizzwizz4@fosstodon.org
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        1 year ago

        At first glance, it might seem weird that we have special terminology for such an arbitrary subset of relationships, especially when it fails to line up with other senses of the word. However, “straight” relationships hold special ritual significance in many cultures, including the dominant cultures of most current and former colonial powers.