The second the jalapeno poppers are out of reach, bedlam

We have to be unburdened by what has been. Remember nothing. Learn nothing. Object permanence is useless here

Which machine do y’all think would be the mean girl who you slowly learn only uses that as a defense mechanism and actually has a heart of gold? I’m going with the leg press

This is the kind of unity I can get behind

“Cornpop was a baaaaaaad dude, which is why I am courting his vote and exclusively his vote”

He is the Christ Man

They are a largely underdeveloped generation politically that is less averse to traditionally “extremist” positions and rhetoric due to constant online desensitization

Might do an AMA at some point soon. Want to catch up with y’all and those are a fun way to do it

Who do you think was doing all those surgeries on the undocumented prisoners?

Crossed 2,000 words. Think this is already the longest thing I’ve written since college and I’ve got a ton of ideas still swirling

It is the best-tasting food dye

A spectre is haunting Hexbear

Gang’s all here!

Writing theory

Holy fuck, I’m gonna looooooooooooooove

These libs were shaking back when we were just power users. They’re not prepared for our era as a power couple

Ask not what your presidential candidate can do for you, but just shut the fuck up and

Love the username lol

Before any Red 40 dorks chime in, consider that I have drawn myself as the chad and you as the soyjack

I’m on a juice cleanse where I only drink Yellow 5. It has been 3 days and I can already hear other people’s thoughts