Happy Pride Month! 🏳️‍🌈

  • some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
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    5 months ago

    Don’t take this lightly, friends. I was already rounded up by the LGBTQ-agenda and dragged to Quantico for questioning by drag queens and people who identified as cats. There was literally a litter box in the corner of the interrogation room. A bit awkward, really.

    Then they beat me up and made me kiss men while they oiled me up for a sensual massage. The horrors!

    I finally ratted on a few friends who are straight and they let me go so long as I promised to suck dick from now on. It’s gonna be tough telling my partner she has to move out eleven months of the year, but I can’t go back. My apt is now painted in rainbows for safety. Surely, they won’t black-bag me and disappear me when they see that, right? Can night vision goggles make out the colors of the rainbow? They can’t? Oh, shit…

    ^^ This was all /s, of course.

    Happy pride month, everybody! Let’s throw it in their bigoted faces.

    • jol
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      5 months ago

      Listen, the cat people, they are not with us. I mean, it’s not as bad and when they try to push pedophiles into our group, sure. The cat people are mostly harmless. But still, I must stress, the cat-identifying people are not allowed in the alphabet.