Needless to say, they’re all waiting in line before the pearly gates. Saint Peter says to the first one “Now, your reward is guaranteed, but you did all make a vow of chastity, so we have to ask: did you ever do anything sexual?”

The lead nun blushes a little before saying “Well, I must admit, I did once… Look upon a man’s penis.” Saint Peter nods sagely and states “That’s fine. We have a font of holy water just here, and you need only clean your eyes to be deemed pure.”

He asks the same to the second nun, who responds “I did once touch a man’s penis.” Again, he directs her “You need only clean your hands to be deemed pure.”

Shortly, the sounds of a scuffle can be heard further back in the line. He gets up from his podium and walks towards a pair of nuns, both shoving each other. “What on earth is this about?”

“I need to go ahead of her, because if I have to gargle that water, I want to do it before she sticks her arse in it!”

    • ccunning@lemmy.world
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      27 days ago

      I understand your confusion. I suspect not everyone keeps their butthole as sparkling clean as SatansMaggotyCumFart does…

      • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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        27 days ago

        I don’t understand why I’m getting downvotes but no explanations.

        Not everyone is smart enough for this kind of high-brow humour.

        • ccunning@lemmy.world
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          27 days ago

          ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

          This was my best attempt at throwing you a lifeline…

          Good luck sailor 🫡

        • bennypr0fane
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          27 days ago

          Daring to ask for help deserves help and an upvote. The nuns have to wash those parts of their bodies in the holy fountain that have come in contact with a penis. The two nuns in the back of the queue are fighting because one will need to wash her throat and the other, apparently, her ass.

    • Lemminary@lemmy.world
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      27 days ago

      Sorry for the downvotes. The joke is that she wants to gargle the holy water to cleanse her throat before entering heaven because she sucked a dick but her nun friend had anal sex and wants to go first to cleanse her butt. I wouldn’t want to gargle butt water even if it was clean, either!