It’s like someone wiped their ass with his face, the morning after chili night

I’m a woman who was wearing a bad shade of foundation that a female makeup artist (and friend) had recommended to me.

One day, wearing it, I went to Sephora. A male salesperson looked at me, covered his mouth with both hands in horror, and said, “Oh honey…your face is a different color from your neck. Here…” and he proceeded to help me and I am forever thankful to this day.

Trump needs that guy in his life right now to tell him like it is.

News analysis has guessed the source of Trump’s orange face for some time—and even the experts I talked to for this piece offered theories: Was it bronzer? Tanning pills? Makeup atop an actual tan? A means to cover rosacea? How much is coming from the makeup artist, and how much is coming from Trump himself?

Kriss Blevens, a makeup artist who has made up every president since Jimmy Carter, offers some clarity.

“Because I have done Trump’s makeup several times, I can tell you that, at times, his face looked bronzer than the rest of him, and that was before makeup,” she says. “My guess was he relied on some self-tanners to try to maintain a certain look that he’d come to feel healthy in from living in Florida.” She believes Trump’s context of living in the state has trained his eye, and even seeing himself in the mirror with so much color had skewed his own objectivity.

“I wanted to neutralize the bronze look, then touch up around the eye area just so it was even in tone,” she says. She asked for Trump’s hands to apply bronzer, and when Trump asked why, she said it was because he talked with his hands and they weren’t as dark as his face.

Then, with the makeup near done, he asked for more pigment on his face.

“He will look and go, ‘Do I need more color?’ And I say, ‘No, you don’t, trust me,’” says Blevens. “I had a word with him, and I’m very diplomatic about it. Owning my power as an artist in the face of power, like a person in power like that—it takes a whole career to even be able to do that.

https://www.fastcompany.com/91181132/its-not-your-imagination-donald-trump-is-less-orange

For as much as he hates brown people you wouldn’t think he’d be that into bronzer.

To me the wildest thing about trump’s appearance is that he can obviously afford to hire a world class stylist and listen to their suggestions and they could nip, tuck, exfoliate, micro needle, microblade and whatever the fuck else they’re doing these days to people until he’s an immaculately polished if somewhat uncannily stepfordesque Hollywood perfect geri-ken doll. Instead he does shit like this.

He better be careful, If he adds a little more bronze his supports will start going after him.

He dipped his face in Putin’s ass

I don’t understand how he thinks that he looks better like that. He could just not wear a hat when he golfs and he would have a real tan in short order.

I’m 100% sure he has that applied each morning by a Secret Service Agent weilding Homer’s makeup shotgun from The Simpsons.

It’s like somebody photoshopped Trump’s face on Trump’s body under different lighting/camera settings.

Looks like he got shit faced before the photo.

Every fucking pro facho or populust needs to look “quirky” so you remember them, not what they say or do.

Does he just buy povidone-iodine antiseptic and smear it on his face every morning? When I used to work with that stuff every day I’d get it on me and it would be this color. I bet that’s what he’s using, probably Alex Jones branded, too.

I was going to come in here and say, “sorry for disgusting you all, but it looks like-” and then some of you came up with something even worse.

Lemmy never lets me down!

NECK VULVA 🍑