Americans should have instead been reading YA romance novels and harems like I did as a child. I turned out fine
Somewhere between a third and half of Americans read at or below a sixth grade level so these books are at the reading level of the median American.
Does watching the movie count as reading the books for americans?
yeah, I remember going to the bookstore dressed as Luna loveshit for the midnight release party of the final book and meeting people with more elaborate costumes who clearly didn’t read the previous book.
For the first time ever, bad people will hold power in America.
Harry Potter is the epitome of liberal politics. Throughout the series you learn how fucked up the wizard world is, magic hitler starts to rise to power because of it, and in the end they beat hitler and Harry becomes a cop. But nothing changes. House elves are still enslaved, and magic races are continued to be discriminated against.
Hitler beats himself, he literally gets killed by not correctly interpreting RULES.
Lmao, didn’t even think of that aspect of it
Nothing Fundamentally Will Change
Umm actually real lib theory hours is that:
trump = ulfric
empire = dems
thalmor = ruZZZia
who’s the dragonborn?
wait trump is on the skyrim side, ulfric is on the irl side??? SKYRIIM CONFIRMED???
Hasan piker (he rigged all the votes cuz he listened to that one trump song)
I kind of empathize because Animorphs, Star Trek, Simpsons and Beast Wars permanently imprinted on my brain in a similar way. The difference is that I know to compartmentalize my child-brain and not trivialize adult issues by publicly saying things like Steve Miller is the Skorponok to Trump’s Megatron, regardless of how true that statement is.
Beast Wars
I see you have truly impeccable taste
The Animorphs To Antifascist pipeline is real
I don’t remember much about Animorphs, but I do remember reading it. I can recall brainworms being the enemy, and there was one guy who got stuck as a bird because he remained in that form for too long. I also remember a girl turned into a fly and was getting pretty close to that limit, too.
Oh, also sexy blue centaur people
Getting chopped in half as a starfish and both halves turn back into a copy of you
Did that happen? That’s be pretty fucking hardcore for a children’s book.
It did!
I don’t remember if that happened exactly but animorphs was pretty fucking dark, not just for a children’s book series. They regularly get injuries which would absolutely be fatal if not for the morphing. The bulk of their enemies are their own mind controlled friends and family, and we do get scenes where we see said mind controlled people screaming and begging for death in cages between mind control sessions.
Holy shit I kinda want to reread them…
Animorphs is pretty great. We’ve got animal facts, we’ve got body horror, we’ve got brutal fights and teenage guerillas with PTSD. We’ve got moral dilemmas, well realized alien biology and sociology, fantastic characters and world changing stakes.
Oh, and also K. A. Applegate supports her trans daughter.
Animorph voter guide:
Rachel: Trump
Cassie: Jill Stein
Marco: No vote
Jake: Kamala
Ax: RFK
This is Rachel slander. Rachel is actually firebombing a Walmart.
Jake is both Trump and RFK. A bullet grazed his head leading to him getting a worm in his brain. Marco is Anthony Scaramucci.
I feel the urge to disagree with you because I expected issues that concern adults in power to be morally gray and complicated but these people are cartoonishly evil. So is it even less correct to compare them to Swiper the Fox or the Hamburgler?
Steve Miller is the Skorponok to Trump’s Megatron
I can’t wait for him to unceremoniously fall into a lava pit.
edit: wow, how is that guy 39?
Miller falling into proverbial lava and a more aggressive, delusional lickspittle like Inferno replacing him actually sounds more likely than him just keeping his job for four years.
Alternatively, he’s waspinator and he never fucking goes away, he just continually becomes a third tier right hand man to those in power but is so ineffective at any job he’s given he probably should have been killed off immediately, if he wasn’t just a walking punchline and scapegoat for those in power.
Waspinator was funny and refused to massacre innocent Neanderthals, though.
Ahhh true yes
Same but without animorphs. I gotta get my bins of childhood beastwarstoys from my folks to photograph and brag post. It’s like a solid 40 or so and I kept the box cards for em too
I’m so fucking jealous. My parents sold all my cool shit when I was visiting family for a summer, then had to gall to ask me where it all was when they found out some of it was worth money.
Black Lives Matter! (Except in the one book series I have read and based my ideology on which has one black person in 7 novels)
Black Lives Matter! (Lavender Brown is black in the first movie, then she gets recasted in later movies as a white lady when she gets speaking roles.)
JKR never actually said Hermione wasn’t blackUmmm sweaty did you forget about kingsly shacklebolt
If she was, then Harry and Ron laughed at a black person for opposing slavery.
Still on brand for JK
I spent so long trying to get chatgpt to write “harry potter and the philosphers stone” in MSE and it kept just slapping in umlauts and ø. Unrelated but it deleted my question when I asked it if it was not allowed to critique the us
If only you knew how bad US politics really is
Shits so fucked, any comparison to fiction feels out of touch
Except for Parable of the Sower.
I really hope not but so far it’s been pretty prescient
It’s either some of the bible, or Harry Potter, which is treated as the bible.
It’s the wrong aesthetic. It’s a bunch of grifters, not emos.
