Hello everyone,

I left a western European country (think sunset at 16:30 in December) for a southern European country. I’m visiting my family for the holidays, and it just feels very strange to be back here.

I now live in a city, and the contrast with the urban sprawl in my previous country is almost jarring. Car dependency is also quite high, while I mostly walk around where I live now.

For people who experienced similar situations, did you find any way to deal with it? I’m only here for a few weeks, so it’s fine, but I guess I just wanted to see if someone has any tip.

It also probably means I made a good decision to move where I live now.

  • goodgame@feddit.uk
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    6 months ago

    Swearing. I live in South East Asia, where swearing is taboo. Visiting my homeland of the UK, it takes a few days to get back my expletive laden fluency. The first few days are painful, as everyone thinks I’m being pretentiously posh. Upon returning to Asia, typically i offend a few people until my language is restrained. Sadly, Southeast Asians don’t appreciate how expressive, cathartic and fun swearing is, it’s a fucking shame.

  • walden@sub.wetshaving.social
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    6 months ago

    About 12 years ago I moved from the US to Vietnam. Moving there was exciting. They do things a lot differently. Modern conveniences are sparse, the people are happy, infrastructure is poor, and most people have mopeds instead of cars.

    Moving back it was hard to come to terms with how excessive most things in the US are. I think time is the only way to get used to it.

  • horsey@lemm.ee
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    6 months ago

    Do you need advice on coping with it? Sounds like an interesting experience. I haven’t lived in different countries but have lived in many different areas of the US. The southwest, south, Midwest, Pacific Northwest and New England vary a significant amount culturally in addition to the differences between rural and urban areas. I don’t have any real advice but I suppose have had similar experiences… I grew up in a very car centric SW city, basically nothing but houses and strip malls like a mini LA, and thought it was great… I loved driving around and exploring the grid of traffic. However decades later I realized I wouldn’t enjoy living there at all and much prefer towns like central Eugene, OR where you can walk to everything you need within a few blocks.

  • improbably_me@lemm.ee
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    6 months ago

    Mostly this is a survivor ship bias. I moved 23 years ago to the US and have had the reverse culture which every time I visit back.

    My explanation is that my mind is still stuck in the country I left at the time and the changes haven’t been organic to witness. It’s like being a time traveler visiting the same space at different times. It’s unavoidable, I think.

  • msfroh@lemmy.ca
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    6 months ago

    If you get married or start dating in the new country, it’s worth being aware of how much more culture shock your partner is likely to experience when visiting your country of origin.

    I kind of made this mistake after leaving my home country for many years, getting married, and moving home(-ish) with my spouse. I needed time to readjust to the surroundings, but it was mostly digging up old memories. (Also, it wasn’t exactly where I came from, so some things were different.) I mistakenly fooled myself into assuming that things that I remembered would be natural for my spouse, which was obviously stupid.

    I was dumb. Don’t be dumb.

  • Noble Shift@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    When I go back to visit family I wonder how the hell I ever stayed so long, why did I stay for so long? How did I endure the stupidity and selfishness and lack of decently educated peoole.

    It’s like I’m visiting a different planet that my ATM card & Uber app work in.

    The single best thing I ever did was move 3200 miles away and start over. My only regret is I didn’t do it the second I turned 18.

  • SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    6 months ago

    How common having like 5-7 people working at your house is. A maid, a cook, a gardener, a caretaker, a guard and a driver. And not like we’re a very rich family. This is quite standard for the middle class. Unimaginable elsewhere.

    Also the cheap labour means all manual labor jobs are cheap and noone does any manual labor on their own.