nemmybun [she/her]

  • 15 Posts
  • 73 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: August 22nd, 2022

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  • VATS made sense in 1 & 2 due to the third-person isometric design. It feels clunky and shoehorned in a first-person setting. The gunplay in vanilla is awful but mods fix that and make it a proper shooter in a way Bethesda can’t seem to manage.

    I understand the philosophy of carry weights but fiddling with inventories in Beth games has never been engaging to me. And the mods add a lot of new stuff so it compound the problem. What’s the point of adding new stuff if you’re not picking it up?




  • I’m playing Tale of Two Wastelands, a conversion mod that glues FO3 and FNV together and changes some stuff up. I installed a ton of mods on top so it’s a smooth experience and everything flows much better. Between looting on hover, removing VATS in favor of bullet time, and removing weights from all items (sorry Bethesda fans but I hate inventory management), the experience is more continuous and immersive. Getting a lot of nostalgia from the Capital Wasteland since I haven’t played FO3 since it came out like… 10 years ago? Yeah we’ll go with that. Don’t correct me I don’t wanna know

    This is my first ever week on an adderall prescription and I found out the hard way how dangerous it is to mix with video games

    Oh and I feel like this image added by a perk mod would make a good emoji with some editing and repositioning


  • My first couple years I grew slowly and then year 3 I grew to a C cup. I then had another growth spurt at year 6 (DD). I’m not saying that’ll necessarily happen for you but at least on my end, my progress goes against the usual timeline that gets thrown around. I think people develop at different rates and it’s difficult to give a timeline for something so biologically complex.

    You can try wearing a padded push-up bra and use inserts to bump up size while waiting for growth.


  • late night blehposting

    Sometimes I feel sad about starting HRT in my 30s. I feel like I’ll always regret spending my 20s trying so desperately to live up to everyone’s expectations while disregarding my own. Not even fully understanding what I wanted because I wouldn’t listen to myself. I wouldn’t allow myself the truth. Told myself to just keep going, it didn’t matter which direction. Every direction is away from where I was, who I was. Gaslighted myself. Ignored that voice until I couldn’t any longer. Drowned her out with drink and drugs until that stopped working too. It came to a point where there was no more distractions and no more escape. Some eggs crack gracefully from within. But eggs that crack under external pressure only fall to pieces. Whether I was ready or not, I had to find myself and put myself back together in a configuration that fit me.

    I am glad I ultimately figured it out even if it was not in the graceful way and I’m happy with myself and how far I’ve come even if it took me awhile. Though I can’t help but wonder how things would be now if I had been stronger and braver and ready to cut ties sooner. If I had started HRT in my 20s (or through some miracle, my teens), would I feel better about myself if testosterone had less time to do its damage? Would I feel like less of an outlier and more connected if I was closer to the average age of the wider community when I started? How different would my life be now if only I could’ve found my way sooner and not worried so much about the opinions of others? Would I be spending less of my time writing all this self-absorbed sadsack shit online an hour after I should be asleep and more time touching grass? (probably not that last one)





  • I finished Romancing SaGa 2 a bit ago. I was nervous to fight the last boss as I had read about how it was supposed to be one of the most difficult last bosses in the series and then I did it one attempt without any major problems. Maybe I just got lucky with attacks because mechanically I can see how it’s supposed to be a hard boss. Overall I enjoyed the game but it’s a hard one to recommend to people due to how unconventional it is.

    I skipped RS3 for now and moved on to the SaGa Frontier remaster. It’s fun but also a step back in complexity from the RS games and so it feels a little too easy sometimes. Also the limited rehashed quests gets old fast (ugh runes). Anyway I’m hoping to be done with this one before Emerald Beyond comes out. I’m abusing NG+ so I don’t have to grind out every single scenario so I don’t think it’ll take too long.