- Remember, you’re a ghost piloting a walking tent of bone, blood, and flesh using a grey jelly computer running on ConfusedMeat_OS. - As is everyone and everything living that you know. - Also, you’re being co-habited by just a massive amount of bacteria, each of which has their own priorities. - I like to think of myself as a walking city. Makes me feel important. - I’m a walking unprofitable for-profit prison. 
 
- Consider them crew 
 
 
 - God someone stitch the blood donation post under that - I think I missed that one - Check my post history :D - You sure made that easy. Thanks! I don’t actually have any opinions on the matter 
 
 
 
- Conspiracy by Big Jenga 
- today’s meta is jenga posting 
- capitalism trying to extract as much blood from humans as possible 
 
- Literally just got out of the hospital from a fall in the bathroom the other day. Got to ride the wee woo wagon and everything and don’t remember any of it. - Edit: I’ve got two black eyes, what’ll probably be a forehead scar, and a very sore body. - Oh and we’ve got some drywall work to do because while I got the blood stains off (apparently made a bit of a mess after I got knocked unconscious), I also ripped the toilet paper holder off the wall and put a good hit in on the heater in the fall. Got pictures too if anybody ever thinks the infomercials about seniors falling were being overdramatic, I’m in my 20s. - Morbidly curious about those pictures. - Don’t worry, not gruesome, like I said, I got the blood stains off:   - Damn bro glad your okay. That could’ve been brain damage. - Yeah that was the bulk of the concern everybody had when I woke up in the ER. 
 
- Adorable eyeshadow, my darling. Also, glad you’re OK, here is hoping you recover soon ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ 
 
 
 
- Got to ride the wee woo wagon - AKA Amberlamps - Bambalance! 
 
 
- I don’t like that so many shower doors are glass. I can’t stop myself constantly imagining a Final Destination situation where I slip, fall into the door, shatter the glass and decapitate myself. - I like to dance in the shower. I’m basically driving behind the logging truck. - A logging truck is probably safe to follow, an 8m log isn’t going to slide off the stack - No I saw a documentary and they fly at you like torpedoes 
 
 
- I believe they’re usually tempered so they don’t break in large pieces. They usually shatter into small rounded pieces. Source: My cousin broke our shower stall. 
 
- I was on digging trenches in the yard for sprinklers when my then girlfriend came out onto the porch. She was kind of staring off into space. “What’s up?” " I just got a phone call. My mom died." “Congratulations.” “Thank you.” - She was a new girlfriend and I did not know anything about the history between her and her mom. But apparently my response was exactly the right one. Mom had slipped and died in her bathroom. - She was a new girlfriend and I did not know anything about the history between her and her mom. But apparently my response was exactly the right one. - Talk about high risk low to medium reward, holy shit what a daredevil - Each person that has ever dated me has understood that I will never react appropriately in a social situation. Not because I act out of spite but because I have zero clue as to what I’m doing. 
 
 
- Sometimes people fall from an aircraft and bounce jovially off the ground; sometimes people turn their heads too quickly and tear the fabric keeping their windpipe in place. - boioioioing 
 yeehee!
 
- Or when you’re on the treadmill and then one of your steps is an inch too far to the side. 
- Them internal organs be poppin’ 
- MORTAL KOMBAT!!! 
- What if I’m taking a shower and I slip on a bar of soap? - OH MY GOD I’D BE KILLED! - By the colonel, in the kitchen, with a giant vibrator. - Sounds like a fun weekend 
 
 













