• just_another_person@lemmy.world
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    14 days ago

    So do all wild mammals that live near fruit bearing trees I’m sure. That’s kind of the gig. It’s not like they’re cultivating their food or checking for spoilage. They’re opportunistic feeders, so fruit on the ground that isn’t overly spoiled is going to be a meal.

    Ever seen drunk Deer or Moose?

      • hector@lemmy.today
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        13 days ago

        Parrots have been known to purposefully get drunk. I had a small type of parrot once and he would drink, I shared wine, beer, gin and tonic, and such, he would drink a bit then cut himself off after a certain amount, and would throw it around with his beak, but that’s a thing with that breed they are known for throwing fruit off of trees for no apparent reason.

        • hector@lemmy.today
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          13 days ago

          Bees are happy drunks at least, it’s the wasps I’ve a problem with it, they are belligerant, along the lines of : What Are You Looking At? Hey big dude with the fancy stuff, has anyone told you you’re an asshole? What, what are you going to do? Is how the conversation often goes.

          But I know they do eat rotten fruit. Actually it explains a lot about wasps realizing they might often be drunk.

          • StinkyFingerItchyBum@lemmy.ca
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            13 days ago

            The problem with wasps is they steal your drinks. Flying around being a nuisance, then as soon as you crack a cold one, they dive right in and drink until they drown. They have no sense of portion control and they never buy you a round.

    • MunkyNutts@feddit.online
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      14 days ago

      My thoughts exactly. Grandparents had an apple tree that hung over the neighbors yard and dropped apples, which rotted and fermented. The neighbor’s donkey would eat them up all the time and get blitzed off his ass.

  • hanrahan@piefed.social
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    13 days ago

    so, who is collecting the monkey piss ? and do they put that on their immigration card as to “purpose of visit” when they arrive or are they engaging locals to collect the monkey piss ? Is there a LinkedIn job description ? how do they advertise for the position ?

    • pdqcp@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      14 days ago

      By holding a bag below them when they pee or pipetted from pooled urine on leaf litter

      Full quote:

      Urine from individually identified chimpanzees was collected opportunistically and non-invasively using a pipette from fresh and dry leaf litter. Chimpanzees predictably urinate just prior to leaving a fruit crop and can often be seen preparing to do so by climbing to a lower branch of a tree. Urination on the ground is often accompanied by defaecation, and in these cases, urine was pipetted from pools in the leaf litter opposite the faeces. Samples were only collected on dry days, since rainwater on understory leaves cannot be visually differentiated from urine. Urine may also be collected directly from underneath urinating chimpanzees by holding out a clean disposable plastic bag placed over the end of a forked branch; urine samples collected from leaf litter were previously shown not to significantly affect measured hormone levels relative to samples collected using a plastic bag

      • groucho@lemmy.sdf.org
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        14 days ago

        Imagine spending weeks in the jungle holding a camouflaged urine collection bag under a chimpanzee while also dodging falling chimpanzee shit. What a life.

        No standups, no Workday goals, just nature. And piss. And flying shit. What a lucky guy.

  • GutterRat42@lemmy.world
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    14 days ago

    When asked to participate in Karaoke, all the drunk apes rate their ability to sing higher than it actually was.

  • finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    Like they aren’t dangerous enough.

    And how does one collect wild chimp urine? “Here, Bobo! In the cup! In the cup, boy! No, not on your sister! In the cup!”