OK, while that was pretty funny, it’s also a bit weird to see articles like this from the onion that kind of minimize legitimate problems. Loot boxes in games, for example, are basically gambling for children who don’t know any better. Monetization of games is a big deal that needs to be taken more seriously.
While I don’t think that’s what the onion was going for, here – they’re making fun of people who senselessly decry video games – the truth is that the gaming industry does have some severe and legitimate problems.
I don’t think it’s trying to touch on monetisation at all, let alone minimise it. It’s just mocking the gameplay loop in Mario and Sonic that involve you run around picking up coins (or rings in Sonic’s case) for no apparent reason.
Yeah, I agree, and I think I tried to touch on that, but then it’s 20-some years too late to be relevant. Then again, maybe “video games are corrupting the youth” is a timeless trope? It just seems to me more like taking shots at something that was relevant when I was a kid, perhaps for the nostalgia factor, but not something that matters much today.
The gambling monetization is an entirely new problem, but the “{something} is corrupting the youth” is both a trope and an utter joke. It used to be that television is corrupting the youth, and before that, radio. Any new media technology ends up with people decrying over their pearl-clutching, “but think of the children” reasons.
I suspect it was more riffing on GTA games and how pearl clutching adults think they cause gamers to be violent or something. Even though that’s been debunked for ages.
Well, at least he isn’t entering strangers’ homes and breaking all the pots.
I wouldn’t be so sure. Last I heard, little Michael started moving around almost entirely by rolling.
Does he make loud “hyah!” sounds while doing it? If he’s silent, he might have been influenced by Dark Souls and you should keep him away from anyone exceptionally tall lest he confuse them for a boss fight.
Because I played Dragon Quest and Zelda, I developed an unfortunate predilection for walking into strangers houses and smashing pots and vases and stuff. Took years of therapy to break that habit. :(
I still can’t even look at a barrel.
How about a chicken?
Guys it’s a real problem. I spent too much time playing Satisfactory, Factorio, and Captain of Industry and now I’ve been tasked with setting up a couple of production lines at work.
This woman is complaining about her kid wanting to pick up coins? Holy shit, what a complete non-issue. My little Timmy got into Super Mario, and now he’s addicted to mushrooms. At least her kid is making money; mine is costing me a fortune in truffles.
Shit… Coin pickup addiction has claimed yet another innocent young soul. All the achievements this poor young fella had ahead of him, taken away by the foul mistress that is “kabling”.
Whoa, don’t think achievements are all good! Video games left me with a chronic addition to achievement hunting that I only escaped from last year. To this day, I still have to fight the urge to take random objects and place them in obtuse places for the off chance that I’ll get an achievement for sticking a traffic cone on a road sign or something.
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Happened to my grandbabies. All they do is sit around catching pokey mans all day. Don’t even know how to start an oven or use a chainsaw but they at least could get the boobies off my back screen after my phone was wormed.
My son’s dog got run over by a car and he said “Mommy mommy where’s the reset button?” life doesn’t have a reset button!!
/s
Wa wa wa wahh
Is her son Ronnie Radke