Thinking of asking a friend to use they/them :ohnoes: I was so amped up about it last night but now I’m not so sure. They belong to a kind of conservative branch of Christianity and I don’t know how they feel about trans people.
I’ve never done this and eventually I’m going to have to do it with everyone in my life :ohnoes:
I’ve never done this and eventually I’m going to have to do it with everyone in my life :ohnoes:
Not if other people out you first. OTOH, sometimes you get to come out to the same person multiple times because they just totally forget (coming out to someone when they’re already drunk might not be a great idea) or think you are joking or don’t know the meaning of words you used and don’t ask or just ignore most of what you say.
Can’t say I’ve ever been outed in a way that I considered a negative.
people suck
I have a tendency to fill the silence with random nonsense that I don’t expect others to actually listen to (and I tell them I don’t expect them to listen to my random nonsense). Unfortunately that means sometimes they tune out what I intend for them to listen to.
That’s good, I was a little worried you were speaking from experience.
No, they do that regardless of how much you talk. It’s very frustrating for me, and especially if you were trying to tell them something important (like your gender).
I was speaking from experience. My brother has outed me to people in a couple of ways (not always related to being trans), for example, but its never been a problem. In terms of being trans, I think he’s only mentioned it to other trans people (maybe only one? Idk) I don’t really care - its not exactly something I intended to keep secret. I just don’t like to bring it up, so if its already done, that’s easier for me.
He did ask for permission before saying anything to our cousin (who is also our roomate), but my cousin forgot and somehow never picked up on it despite many conversations between my brother and I that only make sense in the context of me being trans, changing to they/them pronouns on twitch, and some exploration with presentation (like wearing a dress around the apartment or cosplaying as a girl character). For the longest time, I suspected he didn’t think of me as trans because he’d sometimes reference another person we knew as an example of a trans person but for some reason never mentioned me in those contexts (given I’m not really out, it makes some sense though not to mention it). I mentioned I might try to get HRT soon like two weeks before I actually started and he was still a bit surprised when I did the thing I said I would do (I don’t think he knew what HRT was). So… I think he knows I’m trans now? Guess technically I didn’t say I was though, so maybe he thinks I’m just a cis guy taking E?
Thinking of asking a friend to use they/them :ohnoes: I was so amped up about it last night but now I’m not so sure. They belong to a kind of conservative branch of Christianity and I don’t know how they feel about trans people.
I’ve never done this and eventually I’m going to have to do it with everyone in my life :ohnoes:
I feel this so hard. Hugs
Not if other people out you first. OTOH, sometimes you get to come out to the same person multiple times because they just totally forget (coming out to someone when they’re already drunk might not be a great idea) or think you are joking or don’t know the meaning of words you used and don’t ask or just ignore most of what you say.
A free trial of their reaction seems like it has potential though.
Can’t say I’ve ever been outed in a way that I considered a negative.
I have a tendency to fill the silence with random nonsense that I don’t expect others to actually listen to (and I tell them I don’t expect them to listen to my random nonsense). Unfortunately that means sometimes they tune out what I intend for them to listen to.
That’s good, I was a little worried you were speaking from experience.
No, they do that regardless of how much you talk. It’s very frustrating for me, and especially if you were trying to tell them something important (like your gender).
I was speaking from experience. My brother has outed me to people in a couple of ways (not always related to being trans), for example, but its never been a problem. In terms of being trans, I think he’s only mentioned it to other trans people (maybe only one? Idk) I don’t really care - its not exactly something I intended to keep secret. I just don’t like to bring it up, so if its already done, that’s easier for me.
He did ask for permission before saying anything to our cousin (who is also our roomate), but my cousin forgot and somehow never picked up on it despite many conversations between my brother and I that only make sense in the context of me being trans, changing to they/them pronouns on twitch, and some exploration with presentation (like wearing a dress around the apartment or cosplaying as a girl character). For the longest time, I suspected he didn’t think of me as trans because he’d sometimes reference another person we knew as an example of a trans person but for some reason never mentioned me in those contexts (given I’m not really out, it makes some sense though not to mention it). I mentioned I might try to get HRT soon like two weeks before I actually started and he was still a bit surprised when I did the thing I said I would do (I don’t think he knew what HRT was). So… I think he knows I’m trans now? Guess technically I didn’t say I was though, so maybe he thinks I’m just a cis guy taking E?
I just listened to a Buddhist podcast and I’ll just say make sure they had a good lunch before.