Being able to just simply move on from something as easily.

  • Zozano@lemy.lol
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    5 hours ago

    Maintain eye contact.

    Shit makes me so uncomfortable. Look at me all you want, that’s fine. I’m going to look at that plant.

    If you want to look at that plant, I’ll look at you, but you can’t have both.

    Unless we both look at the plant. That’s fine too.

  • mitrosus
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    6 hours ago

    I wish I could bang ass for longer than a minute :/

  • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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    8 hours ago

    I have ADHD. Anyone telling you it is a super power is either lying or has a drastically different experience with it than I do.

    • Nexy@lemmy.sdf.org
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      4 hours ago

      Its a super power in battle/reaction situations. In all aplicable areas of modern age, its a nightmare.

      • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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        3 hours ago

        Nope. Absolutely not. That is your experience with it. Not mine. It’s a disability. Please don’t describe my experience with a disability as a super power.

        • Nexy@lemmy.sdf.org
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          3 hours ago

          I say because I have ADHD too. My reaction are more thoughtful and cold in stress situations like theft assaults or accidents are way better that neurotypical ones (I’m from latinamerica so they are very common). But I have so much problems to do normal things daily and they are ruining my life.

    • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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      8 hours ago

      What up insomnia gang? Coming to you love from the bed at 6 AM. Too late to fall back asleep, too early to get up.

  • Murple_27@lemmy.ml
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    9 hours ago

    I wish I could have a baseline functional understanding of human interaction & relationships.

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      5 hours ago

      As someone who transitioned from a deeply introverted anxious young adult with a persistent stammer, to a relatively outgoing person who is capable of clear communication, the secret is caring less and forgetting that you exist.

      There are steps though to get there:

      • Look at a person. De-age them back to when they were a shy or excited or inquisite toddler. That’s their base model. Anything built on that is just extra wisdom or fluff or bluster.
      • Talk to people like you would an innocent child, just use more grownup words.
      • Cheat questions:
        • “How was your day today” “what did you get up to” “hows your upcoming week looking”
      • Cheat responses:
        • “nice!” “well done!” “oh damn”
      • Cheat moves:
        • Eye contact. Look at people in the eye, then look away when describing something, then look them in the eye again.
        • Nodding: Make nodding gestures as they respond to you
        • Hands: Gesture with your hands when you describe something.
        • Smile: You don’t need to smile, but it helps. You can look away when you do it.
      • Listening helps but is top-tier and isn’t a requirement
      • Learn to build connections through topics though. If they’re talking about cats, remember your dog.
      • Signal it’s your turn: I suck at this and wait for gaps, which usually means I forget what I wanted to say, but you can signal in other ways
        • Yes: Finger gun and a nod whilst inhaling
        • No: Polite laugh and a head shake whilst exhaling
        • Random: if someone won’t stop, they need to be stopped. Just jump in with your crab story, who cares.

      This should hopefully get you along the way to forgetting that you exist in a conversation, and it should become second nature after a while.

  • Thelsim@sh.itjust.works
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    12 hours ago

    I wish I could actually listen to what is being said to me for more than 5 minutes. Instead of having my attention drift off and me starting to daydream about something the other said.

  • mub@lemmy.ml
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    24 hours ago

    To be consistent on a physical level.

    I play guitar and games like rocket league, things that require excellent physical dexterity, and consistency is a big factor. I struggle to repeat physical actions the same way every time. I practice lots, and I’m reasonably good at both things (imho), but I know I screw up more than most people because I can’t repeat things the same way every time.

    • residentmarchant@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I truly don’t know how some people work if not in a manic state for 10 hrs straight because you have a bunch of stuff due at the same time

      I guess I could spread out the work, but sometimes I’m passively thinking of the best way to tackle it and other times it’s a task I don’t like doing.

            • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠@slrpnk.net
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              1 day ago

              You don’t want a poker face! You want to be very expressive. But voice is even more important. Pitch voice soft and a little low, and always decreasing at the end of a sentence, the opposite of asking a question. Like a kind parent talking to a tired toddler or particularly stupid dog.

              You’re trying to slip information into the person at a subconscious level, and the information you want to slip in is that you, the speaker, are trustworthy and will take care of them. It’s much easier to do this than to actually figure out and fix whatever bullshit problem they’ve created for themselves.

              Note that this is not effective on people you see everyday, as they will eventually realize you didn’t do anything to actually help them. But for one-offs, work associates-of-associates, clients you’re not the sole contact for, and the more distant sort of relative, it works pretty well.

              • MonkeMischief@lemmy.today
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                3 hours ago

                That’s pretty hilarious and I don’t doubt it’s efficacy!

                I’ll admit my trouble with these situations is I can’t help but care about people or fixing things, often to save them from themselves as if they’re, like you said, toddlers.

                I start to resent being taken advantage of though. It’s tough. :(

                • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠@slrpnk.net
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                  3 hours ago

                  So you’re also struggling with the apathy part, huh? For me, waiting tables, I just don’t think of the guests as fully human. They come in hungry and I make sure they leave happy. Giving them a sense of assurance is a part of that, but as soon as they’re out the door they cease to exist.

                  As to resentment, you shouldn’t be resentful of something you choose to do, or to put it another way, you shouldn’t choose things to do that harm your own well-being.

  • WhatsHerBucket@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    I would love to be able to say the most ridiculous, warped, ignorant, crazy ass shit, and have everyone else believe me to the point they are willing to fight on my behalf.

    Oh wait…

  • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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    23 hours ago

    People who are very good at instruments. I wish I just knew guitar to be able to shred on demand, but I just could not put in the time and effort to get there myself.