This is how I feel about work. I got a new job, I liked a lot of the tasks, they feel meaningful and it’s a heckuva lot better than the one that I used to have!
Less than six months in and I’m like "Okay, this is no longer new to me. I’ve already peaked here. Sure it generates currency but I have to come back already?? "
I’m trying to remind myself I don’t want a job that’s consistently a new and novel challenge, because that will burn me out on choosing new and novel challenges for myself.
Still! Frustrating. If this was skilled work like the 2014-ish tech industry I could just jump in 6 more months and double my salary, but it’s not. Lol
Not because the excitement is gone, but really because your brain has spicy connectors that misbehave and misfire all the time…
Makes it even worse.
I think there’s some that go through that dwindling urge to keep going. But there are also the ones that you describe, the “oh, new shiny thing”.
your brain has spicy connectors that misbehave
you know what i’ve been thinking? your brain doesn’t actually misbehave, it does exactly what it’s meant to do. just that society is talking bullshit expectations about your behavior. and your brain doesn’t follow the bullshit.
Do elaborate
Abandoning
At some random moment completely and utterly purge it from thought for a random amount of time (and then several months later going ‘oh yeah, shit’).
Yup! It’s not “abandoning” per se, it’s more like “totally forgetting that I was trying a new life routine, so stopped doing it”
That’s why it’s so hard to take medication every day.
I’ve been vegan for a year now, with 100% consistency and not really any struggle. And still, I know that on any given day there might just be a moment where I could find myself with a half-eaten ham sandwich in my hand because I forgot. It’s so fucked up, how is anyone supposed to build any form of identity when significant parts of it are always at risk of dropping off and being forgotten for no good reason 😮💨
On the vegan part; you aren’t less of a vegan if you accidentally eat meat. The identity is your intention, not your perfection.
OMG, preach! Louder for the kids in the back!
People are far too eager to identify under monolithic cults that demand perfection, instead of just, doing their best at what they feel is a good thing.
Joke’s on you, I don’t even make it to step two!
No kidding. Making the schedule is like 99% of the dopamine. Why actually do it for like 1%?
“My life is gonna be so great ‘when’ I do this”
Is this adhd or just everyone?
Adhd symptoms are experienced by everyone, having then all the time and them causing problems in your life when untreated is Adhd.
Plot twist, everyone has a teeny tiny little bit of adhd.
Just not the blinking in and out if existence- kind of crippling bullshit version of adhd.
I’m like this with RPG’s too.
If I had the ability to restart my life over, I would probably never get past 5.
Accidentally fall back into your system because you don’t actually have another, or really any backup plan whatsoever. Play it off like it was discipline. Share system with other NDs as if you have answers.
is this a persistent-storage thing that i’m too ram-focused to understand?
Oh but just you wait when you around to it the second or third time in life… all the experience you’ve gained, and hatred towards wasted time. You’ll devour planets!
For a while…
That’s why i only make routines that are easy to follow because they cost almost no energy.
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Very little is unique to neurodivergent people. Everybody pees but if you have to run to the loo every 5 minutes, you should see a doctor.
You know I remember this contest for a toilet that was a recliner and had an Xbox, laptop and tv attached. I lost that contest.
Heart-wrenching 😢
Bowel shaking as well
What is this behaviour “unique to neurodivergent people” that everyone seems to think these communities should be about exclusively?
