Seriously almost all of my friends have kids now and no one has time to hang out anymore. This is bullshit and must stop!

  • itappearsthat@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    51
    ·
    8 months ago

    in contrast basically none of my friends are having kids, to the point where my impression of population growth is that the human race decided to stop reproducing in 2020

      • Dudewitbow@lemmy.zip
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        19
        ·
        edit-2
        8 months ago

        to some extent. gen mz is not having children due to the economic climate in several countries. id argue one of the reasons you might see more late 30s is because some women worry about becoming less fertile, as after 30, you progressively have a harder time to give birth, and gets much worse as time passes on, so those who want children are pushed to do so sooner rather than later.

      • FoolishFool [she/her]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        8
        ·
        8 months ago

        I think some Elder Millenials were lucky enough to get enough scraps to still pull off the house/kids thing, but anyone younger prob. has way worse odds.

    • Raebxeh@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      17
      ·
      8 months ago

      Seconding this. I had kids earlier than most of my friends and we essentially got abandoned for years by them because they were really weird about so many aspects of the necessary changes we were making.

        • Raebxeh@hexbear.net
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          10
          ·
          8 months ago

          Thanks I guess that explains years of gaslighting and ghosting instead of just talking to us since we were supposedly such good friends. We weren’t pushing them on anybody. We had a sitter. People just stopped inviting us.

          The few friends that stuck with us just made some clear boundaries up front and we’ve been cool for over a decade. It’s not hard.

          • Ithorian [comrade/them, null/void]@hexbear.netOP
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            4
            ·
            8 months ago

            That blows. I’m not a huge fan of kids but playing the fun uncle for a few hours every now and then is pretty cool. It kinda sucks though when I go see a buddy I haven’t seen in a year and they have to deal with the kids till 8pm and then be in bed 10. I don’t work so I can hang out when ever but it can still be extremely hard to schedule things with parents. In another few years though I hope things will be easier, 8 years olds can entertain themselves enough to actually chill with your friends.

    • Ithorian [comrade/them, null/void]@hexbear.netOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      33
      ·
      8 months ago

      Good call. You can leave a one year old cat by itself for hours and still have time for friends. I try to convince my parent friends to do that with their kids but everyone seems to think its a bad idea.

  • Babs [she/her]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    30
    ·
    8 months ago

    My Most Adult friend has a son and that kid kicks ass and we can’t wait till he’s old enough to join us for DnD.

  • Mindfury [he/him]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    25
    ·
    8 months ago

    nah kids rock

    go round to your friends’ houses, help them make dinner and make funny faces at the tiny, goofy-ass person. it rules

  • Rod_Blagojevic [none/use name]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    22
    ·
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    I hate people that complain all the time but never offer any solutions. How exactly am I (a sex haver) supposed to stop having kids?

    Edit: Are you looking for friends?

      • Tankiedesantski [he/him]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        14
        ·
        8 months ago

        Seriously, who would willingly bring a kid into this soon to be uninhabitable world?

        Anti-natalism is cringe.

        My parents were born during the Great Chinese Famine and lived through the Cultural Revolution. Their parents were born during the Chinese Civil War and lived through fighting the Japanese and the KMT. All of these world shattering events and never once did any of them regret living.

        • asg101 [none/use name, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          13
          ·
          8 months ago

          Anti-natalism is cringe.

          Denial is, well, denial.

          None of those events produced the methane rich superheated atmosphere that runaway global warming is bringing us, which is ACTUALLY going to be “world-shattering”. Feedback loops don’t end until equilibrium is reached, the earth has seen it before, we are seeing it now. Ignoring it isn’t going to make it go away.

          • shitholeislander [none/use name]@hexbear.net
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            11
            ·
            8 months ago

            yea lol people clearly still aren’t grasping how terrible things are going to get soon if they think the Great Chinese Famine compares. it’s not anti-natalism to not want your own child to have to go through that!

            • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              2
              ·
              edit-2
              8 months ago

              First-world problems will never get as bad as famine or Japanese occupation. Get a grip.

              If you think 2040 USA is ever going to get anywhere as bad as WW2 genocidal occupation and famine, you are seriously uncalibrated.

              • shitholeislander [none/use name]@hexbear.net
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                12
                ·
                edit-2
                8 months ago

                Why do you assume I’m talking about the USA? Seems very Americabrained. Much of the world is not able to feed its own population and has to import a great deal of food. My country imports around half. In the event of global famine and caloric shortfall due to the consequences of climate change (eminently possible by 2040), what is going to stop famine for billions if capitalism and imperialism continue to exist? What is going to stop a state and political order that is becoming openly authoritarian and reactionary from carrying out genuine atrocities on a large scale to manage this crisis? You don’t seem to have grasped how serious climate change is.

                • wopazoo [he/him]@hexbear.net
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  2
                  ·
                  8 months ago

                  Do you think it’s morally acceptable for Gazan Palestinians to have children, knowing that their children may live short, painful lives terminated by a violent death?

                  Was it acceptable for European Jews to have children during the Holocaust, knowing full well that they all might end up hanging on meat hooks?

                  Is it morally acceptable to have hope for the future?

                  Is it morally acceptable to resist genocide by having children?

                  Or do you think that anything less than a perfect life is unacceptable?

  • Tachanka [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    The Chinese had it all figured out with the 1 child policy: have 1 so you’re below population replacement rate, and the reserve army of labor still shrinks, and wages go up, but at the same time you get to raise a tiny little comrade.

    spoiler

    don’t take this post as a serious assessment of all the ramifications of the 1 child policy pls, it’s a shitpost

      • Wheaties [she/her]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        16
        ·
        edit-2
        8 months ago

        It’s funny and sad the nuclear family has eradicated inter-generational living to the point where we can only describe it in terms of cost. Grandparents get to see, interact with and help raise grandchildren, adult children are present to support their older parents as needed, children get a wider circle of familial behavior to observe and learn from as well as the more stable environment it provides. I’ve met too many people my age with no experience of what age does to the body, who can’t distinguish between someone suffering from memory trouble and someone living with chronic pain.

        I know you can’t just say “we ought to do inter-generational living” and walk away. Can’t just slot people into a structure like that and expect it to be hunky-dory. But I also can’t deny this intractable sense of loss. That our lives are that much more shallow for its absence.