John Malkovich’s voice and spectacular cadence in your head:

  • “It is estimated that Santa’s sleigh weighs 353 thousand tons. So, traveling at 650 miles per second would create such enormous friction that Santa and his reindeer would burst into flames. You understand? Like a meteor entering the atmosphere. This is a scientific fact.
  • unexposedhazard
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    1 year ago

    I know this is supposed to be a shitpost, but what does weight/mass have to do with friction tho?? Also no even thaaat fast, so probably no flames but enough friction to tear their skin off.

    • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      The friction (and resulting heat) I am assuming would come from wind resistance. Think along similar lines to this classic XKCD article.

      650 miles per second, as Malkovich said in the skit, translates to about 2.3 million miles per hour, or about 3.8 million kilometers per hour for the more mathematically reasonable among us out there.

      A much lighter meteor traveling much slower than that through the atmosphere is enough to generate the heat needed for combustion, so it would probably apply to Santa in this hypothetical scenario, too.

      • unexposedhazard
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        1 year ago

        650 miles per second

        looks like i failed reading comprehension… just skimmed that part and assumed per hour instead of second lol

      • the_tab_key@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Air “friction” has no dependence on mass though. An airplane will effectively have the same air resistance fully loaded as compared to if empty. The surface area/geometry doesn’t change. Same would apply to Santa’s sled.

      • Jumuta@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        650 mi/s is 1040,000m/s which is mach 3032. the heating at that point would be mainly from the superheated plasma, not wind resistance

      • Jesse@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        And they’d be starting and stopping all over the place, so the kind of acceleration needed to reach that speed would kill any known organic being via g forces before they’d even suffer from the fire. But he’s one of the fae, so data on them is lacking I guess.

      • dalekcaan@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Small nitpick, technically at those speeds the majority of the heat comes from air compressing in front of the object, not the air friction

      • dQw4w9WgXcQ@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        The wind resistance shouldn’t be dependant on the mass. Shape of the sleigh would be the real factor.

        But another thing to consider is that the gigantic mass and heat capacity. Given that the sleigh has a good heat distribution, it would take a lot of air resistance to actually make the sleigh combust. I don’t have a decent guess for the average heat capacity, so I don’t actually know if it’s significant enough, but the calculation is more complex than just looking at the speed.

      • ch00f@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        The heat doesn’t come from friction. It comes from compression of the gas in front of the object.

    • BurnedOliveTree@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I would assume to move such a mass at such a speed would mean an enormous force, which together with air not wanting to move would create such a friction

    • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      I’m guessing, this is a Santa that doesn’t magically fly through the air, but actually sleighs on the ground…

    • ch00f@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Also meteors don’t burn up due to friction. They burn up due to the heat generated by compressing the atmosphere stuck in front of them.