The Moscow Times reports that Russia’s Ministry of Health has pressed research institutes to provide immediate updates on their efforts to combat aging, cognitive decline, and osteoporosis, as well as to strengthen the immune system.

“We were asked to urgently send all of our developments, and the letter arrived, let’s say, today, but everything had to be sent yesterday,” one researcher told Meduza.

The urgency is reportedly driven by Mikhail Kovalchuk, a 77-year-old scientist and close friend of Putin. Kovalchuk, who heads the Kurchatov Nuclear Research Institute and has ties to a state-funded genetics program that includes Putin’s eldest daughter, endocrinologist Maria Vorontsova, is said to be leading the push for life-extension research.

“The big boss set the task, and officials rushed to implement it in every possible way,” according to a Kremlin insider.

Kovalchuk is described as being “obsessed with eternal life.”

He reportedly pitched the idea to Putin.

  • niktemadur@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Oh man… don’t you just want him to try some experimental shit that backfires immediately and horribly. And for this to happen very, very soon.

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Stalin may have lived longer. He had a heart attack that may have been able to be survived, but no doctor in the room would treat him. It’s debated if it was due to fear of punishment if they failed, or due to everybody wanting that asshole to die.

      Either way, he may have lived 20 more years if doctors did something besides nothing.

      That being said, maybe todays russian doctors will be equally helpful. That is to say, they do nothing if something goes wrong.

      • Squizzy@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Wasnt it a stroke and no one disturbed him for ages in his office effectively enabling his desth through inaction

      • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        I propose that the ruzzians come up with volunteer doctors for putin. And sure, let’s try anything and everything these guys come up with…on putin! You know, to extend his life! I heard lemons are good for life injection!

  • mozz@mbin.grits.dev
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    1 month ago

    Is this bullshit? This feels like bullshit.

    The Moscow Times reports

    No link? I couldn’t find it on their web site.

    reportedly

    is said to be

    according to a Kremlin insider

    is described as

    Etc etc

  • Asafum@feddit.nl
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    1 month ago

    Ancient Chinese medicine always works, trust me bro, just take a bunch of mercury every day. The Chinese did it before and that dude has an amazing tomb now so it’s all cool. Just do it.

  • Carrolade@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Yeah I think that one is still pretty far away. The degradation of the DNA in all the various cells of your body over time is a pretty formidable challenge.

  • taiyang@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Somewhere, in some pathetic bunker, Putin is having terrible diarrhea day after day while taking this so-called treatment.

    Please enjoy that thought while you continue doom scrolling.

      • taiyang@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Certain “cures” don’t sit well with your gut, and it’s a pleasant image, so that’s my thought after hearing he’s getting treated for age.

    • Minarble@aussie.zone
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      1 month ago

      Ahh the old philosophical question:

      “Would you take eternal life if it basically involved sitting on the toilet shitting your guts out all day every day?”

  • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Which Putin? This newest one is the worst replacement they’ve gotten yet. Can’t even do the voice and the surgery scars did not heal well.

  • AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space
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    1 month ago

    I am wondering whether any analysts at the CIA or similar agencies picked up on this years ago in his psychological profile (i.e., the narcissism, paranoia, germophobia, lack of a succession plan, and such) and started making plans. Perhaps there’s a biotech startup in, say, Serbia or somewhere, funded in 2007 with opaquely sourced seed money, “researching” “cellular de-aging” or something, with convincingly faked tests giving just enough promise. The research is fake, of course, and the business is meant as bait to be acquired by a Kremlin entity or one of Putin’s human-wallet oligarchs, at which point Putin’s fate is in the hands of whatever spooks are controlling it.

    • lostinfog@reddthat.com
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      1 month ago

      It was very quick of you guys to get new accounts… gotta keep shilling for the kremlin gremlin, amirite?