I used to believe that if you just work hard you’ll get ahead in life
I always thought cigarettes contain tar, as in the substance asphalt on the road is made from. It always felt weird to me, why would they put it in the cigarettes but I figured maybe they need it so the tobacco doesn’t fall out or something.
Wait, they don’t contain tar?
In the same way that they don’t contain ash. The tar and ash are produced by combustion.
That the Mormon god was totally real
Trees make wind because whenever there was wind, they moved.
Ass cheeks were shit tanks.
Daaaaamn gurl swing them big ole shit tanks!
Old people were always old
That god(s) exist(s).
That my family cared about me and supported me.
There absolutely can, and in many cases should, be a difference between your blood family, and your adult family.
The former was chosen for you. The latter should only be chosen by you. I can easily tell you that excising certain siblings, aunts and uncles, and a specific cousin, from my life, my life has far less stress than it used to in my 20s. Now that I tell people that “this is my boundary, try to cross it at your own peril,” and actually hold the line, I have far more family than what I was born into.
When I was six years old or so, my sister called me a “cosweb” and told me it was the worst thing ever. I completely believed her for a long time.
That enough hot water bath could work just as well as sunbathing for getting a tan. Hey, both things can burn your skin, it’s perfectly logical!
That my parents knew what they were doing, made good choices, and were reasonable people.
No, no, … and no.
That I’d grow up to eat candy, collect baseball cards, play video games, and read comic books.
No (type II diabetes runs in my family), no (wtf is a baseball card anyway), no (video games were replaced with homework permanently), and — well, actually — yes.
I love a good comic book, graphic novel, and/or animated series.
The crust on bread had more nutrients than the center. My dad didn’t want to cut my crusts off lol.
My uncle always swapped the words breast and best so my cousin mixes them up sometimes to this day. He said ‘breast friend’ at his brother’s wedding
The crust doesn’t, but for the love of all that is good and scientific, stop peeling your veggies people! Carrots and potatoes especially. Almost all the nutritional value is in the skin of those two, and probably most other, other than peanuts, legumes.
Just remember to thoroughly wash the skin, and cut out any “eyes” on the potatoes or potential small scale rotting. Pesticides aren’t something that your gut wants anything to do with.
Almost all the nutritional value is in the skin
Uhhhh, you might want to look that one up. For some veg, there is more fibre in the skin, but that’s about it.
I’m a chef that has studied nutrition as much as I can, for green and leafy veggies that is absolutely true, but those aren’t the ones that people normally skin.
The legumes that I specifically pointed out have a ton of vitamins that concentrate in the skin specifically, and those are the “vegetables” that the layman has a tendency to skin. The center is mostly starch and sugar.
When I was young and hanging with my great aunt’s church friends, we were walking to the store. I went to link arms with my great aunt and her friend was like, “Hey, that’s dangerous. You can’t defend yourself. Someone could jump you.” From that point, I assumed that anyone who was linking arms was, like, giving a show of dominance. Like, “Yeah, we’re linked up, because we can still take anybody even with only one arm.” Didn’t change that mindset until I was in middle school after I tried to explain to my friend how dangerous walking with her boyfriend was because “how would they defend themselves.” 🙃
I thought that if you swallowed your gum, it would stay in your stomach forever, so you had to make sure to never do it because eventually there would be no room for food anymore.
Also, old CRT TVs had this static electricity sort of fuzzy feeling on the screen, and if you ran your hand over it, it would dissipate. I thought that by doing that, you were absorbing the TVs power and if you did it too much, it would eventually stop working.
Lastly, I believed with all my heart that all the pets you ever owned were waiting for you in heaven and it made me mad when my (very devout Catholic) grandma told me that pets and animals don’t have souls and so they didn’t go to heaven. I said if that was true then I didn’t want to go to heaven! I’m atheist now, so I don’t even believe that anyone goes to heaven, but if anyone deserves to go, it’s all the kitties, puppies, and various rodentia I’ve loved in my life.
My stomach one was watermelon seeds. My brother told me that if you swallowed them they would grow in my stomach and of course I believed him. There’s plenty of water and nutrition in there and every time I open my mouth they could be getting sunlight.
The Rainbow Bridge, is part of Catholic Dogma according to Pope John Paul II
Then in 1990, Pope John Paul II reversed that thinking and proclaimed that animals do have souls and are “as near to God as men are.”
Side note: At that time in my life, one of the schools I regularly attended as a non-Christian was a Catholic school that was called Pope John XXII, and I was legitimately confused as to how there were only 2 Pope John Pauls, while there were at least 23 Pope Johns. I think I thought that since a pope doesn’t have term limits, that there must not have been too many more popes than British Prime Ministers. Having grown up, I can safely say that while I wasn’t exactly incorrect, I was still criminally underestimating the sheer number of people that held both titles.
At my Catholic high school, one of the teachers who was a Dominican sister told us that animals can’t go to heaven but it’s possible for them to be recreated in heaven.
I feel fine as long as my rabbit didn’t go to purgatory or hell, but non-eternal souls are hard to relate to
Pope John Paul II told her to kick rocks in 1990.
https://missdarcy.org/from-rainbow-bridge-to-pearly-gates/
Then in 1990, Pope John Paul II reversed that thinking and proclaimed that animals do have souls and are “as near to God as men are.”
If you could instantiate soulless virtual beings in heaven for your amusement at will, it would be way less boring. You could recreate Mortal Kombat
We found a dead baby bird. Was told most animal babies don’t live to adulthood. Knew people were animals so it was likely me and most of my friends would be dead by 21
I mean, that would have been true up until very recently in history.
If you happen to find a dead bird in particular, please don’t pick it up. They have mites on their feathers (skin?) that will absolutely jump on you and absolutely fuck up your skin. You can literally jump in the shower once the itching starts, and you will be in for something like localized poison ivy where those little microscopic (probably not, but they were so tiny I couldn’t see them) assholes were, or at least wherever they bit you.
I would generally caution against actually touching anything that is dead. Too many pathogens, nasty bacteria, and potential touch contracted illnesses.
