- cross-posted to:
- Memes@europe.pub
- cross-posted to:
- Memes@europe.pub
- “Why did you apply here and not at the other company?” 
 “I applied there too and the interview is tomorrow.”
- “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” - “In your company.” - at a much better company after this one died chasing the crypto/AI/whatever magical tech comes next trend 
- I always had a hard time with this one, I just say successful lmao. - I don’t know the ins and outs of your company, what any kind of progression may look like, what opportunities will present themselves, etc, the question just always seemed odd. 
 
- I won’t rule out trying this. - I’m also eager to try: “What are your strengths?” “I am extremely humble.” - My humility knows no bounds. 
 
- Yeah, what are you good at? - I bring 12 years of experience with system x and system y. I’m an engineer but I enjoy selling customers solutions, not just telling them what they need to buy. - “Thanks for your time, we’ll call you later.” - proceeds to receive an automated rejection email after 2 weeks of waiting - You guys get answers? - I get a cryptic ARG that lasts two years, which at the end just says “You’re rejected, lol” 
 
 
 
 
- We joke, but the number of duds in interviews is crazy. The answer doesn’t matter, having an answer matters. - you hiring? - Often. The market still cooking for white collar work. 
 
 
- It is a fucking stupid question. I’m supposed to invent some horse shit about why this is an awesome company that I specifically chose, and simply being truthful “you’re recruiting and I need a job” isn’t acceptable. - I just turn it around. “I have blah blah skills and interests. It looks like you need blah and offer blah opportunity.” It’s easy for me, though, because I have a specialty certification. 
 
- “well i can give you a 20 page dissertation on the ways aziraphale loves crowley” - As long as you don’t delve into Deaniel/Castean… - there is only destiel, sammeg, dreamhunter, sheriff wives, and darlie bradbaum :3 - (disclosure this is in jest; i’m not policing anyone else’s ship!) 
 
 
- Why did you choose our company? - Bitch! I’m broke! 
- Bold of you to assume they don’t ghost us before it gets this far 
- “Claud tell me why I should by excited to join this company” 
- Job interview trainers be like: - You’re supposed to do a throughout research on the company, and write a nice little story how much you’re a fan of the company, and how much you want to work there, and you spent all your life on training to be able to work at a company like that. 
- Because I need money 
- Cant you see my fucking jacket? I am a doctor! Or maybe lab scientist… 










