• @nutbutter
    link
    695 months ago

    In water, Hippopotamus. On land, Rhinoceros.

      • Joe
        link
        875 months ago

        A whale, or possibly a bowl of petunias

        • @NotSpez@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          145 months ago

          I wish I could understand what went though the bowl of petunias’ mind when it thought ‘not again’ though…

          • GreenPlasticSushiGrass
            link
            fedilink
            195 months ago

            I just read about this! The bowl of petunias was an incarnation of Agrajag. “Not again” referred to being killed by Arthur. Again.

                • @spauldo@lemmy.ml
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  19
                  edit-2
                  5 months ago

                  They’re referring to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

                  Specifically, they’re talking about a creature (the bowl of petunias created high above the surface of an airless world as a byproduct of a star drive powered by improbability) who has reincarnated many, many times, but in every life is killed by an otherwise inoffensive and constantly bewildered British man.

  • ivanafterall
    link
    fedilink
    415 months ago

    My money is on hippo every day of the week. You’d have to find a freak specimen of a rhino to compete with even an average hippo.

    Rhino weight range: 1,320 - 2,090 pounds

    Hippo weight range: 2,900 - 4,000 pounds

    • @Windex007@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      285 months ago

      Maybe I’m missing something, but I’m seeing in my googling that MOST rhino species are more massive than hippos.

    • @DogMuffins
      link
      English
      265 months ago

      It varies depending on rhino species but rhinos are generally larger.

      Largest land mammals are elephant > rhino > hippo.

      White rhinos are often over 3,500kg.

    • @tpyo@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      45 months ago

      Huh. I guess I thought rhinos were bigger. Well I bet one could take on a pygmy hippo!

      weigh 180–275 kg (397–606 lb)

  • @Pringles@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    405 months ago

    Hippos are crazy territorial, so my money would be on them. It’s hard to imagine a rhino losing the battle, but the pure unfiltered rage of a hippopotamus when you trespass his territory will frighten even the boldest of rhinos.

    • roguetrick
      link
      fedilink
      295 months ago

      Rhinos are territorial enough to try to fight elephants. They lose, but they try.

      • blanketswithsmallpox
        link
        fedilink
        -1
        edit-2
        5 months ago

        Just made me think. Do the animals that win so much become smart because they’re the top, or do they become smart then hit the top of the food chain?

        Always column a and b… but I can almost guarantee mammalian apex predators get smarter the higher they are on the food chain due to increased and varied food supplies. Giving it a better and stronger reinforcement mechanism for increased intelligence…

        Neat.

        Ants, bees, humans, orcas, wolves, elephants, birbs…

        I suppose the key is making sure to have pack behavior too. Loners like Crocs, great whites, etc too good to need to adapt plus aren’t social.

    • balderdashOP
      link
      fedilink
      15
      edit-2
      5 months ago

      Yes, actually. He seemed to think it wasn’t so clear cut, but everyone here has their money on the hippo

    • wellDuuh
      link
      fedilink
      English
      15 months ago

      WOAA… elephants are way smarter than i thought!, pulled one up on rhino, without a sweat!

    • Deez
      link
      fedilink
      English
      35 months ago

      I’m not a large water dwelling mammal, where did you get that preposterous hypothesis?

  • @DogMuffins
    link
    English
    155 months ago

    I’m surprised everyone is betting on hippos.

    Rhinos are bigger (generally), heavier, move faster, have collagen armor, and have a horn.

    • @ColeSloth
      link
      35 months ago

      Hippos are more angry if you fuck with em.

      • @DogMuffins
        link
        English
        35 months ago

        Try getting angry at 3,500kg of pointy faced Rhino moving at 50kmh and see how much that helps.

  • @BearJCC@lemmy.sdf.org
    link
    fedilink
    English
    135 months ago

    Rhino’s have low intelligence, can’t swim (well), hace poor eyesight, and are smaller. My money’s on the Hippo.

    • @ColeSloth
      link
      15 months ago

      Well rhinos are often bigger, but that won’t help them enough.

  • Sirico
    link
    fedilink
    English
    115 months ago

    Mr Rodgers in a blood stained sweater

  • roguetrick
    link
    fedilink
    95 months ago

    It would likely be counterproductive to try to bite a charging rhino.