- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion@sh.itjust.works
- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion@sh.itjust.works
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Send more DOGE staffers into the streets alone at night with their propeller beanies and oversized lollipops.
Damn, I guess Big Balls wasnāt enough.
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IDK how much trump can really be blamed for this one - that idiot is a contender for āMost Punchable Faceā and in his vast wisdom decided to just go out and wave that thing around because he lives in a world where thereās no consequences for your actions.
However, your theory is far funnier.
I mean, if he wants a higher murder rate, that can be arranged.
Right? Iāll show up for some flag burning and effigies. Maybe we bring a guillotine and see where the night takes us.
He wants ICE shot down, and they should be. But see where Big Balls taking a mere ass beating got us. Not an excuse to back down! Just sayinā.
whatās he gonna do, sue the criminals for not doing enough crime?
a pragmatic system of legalized crime through guilds, with the Thieves Guild and Assassinsā Guild handling their respective activities under the watchful eye of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch and the Patrician, Lord Vetinari.
Vetinari would be a massive improvement over Trump.
To be frank, even a dead badger would be.
Letās call him Frank.
Dead Badger 2028
Combine with an armed citizenry, Iām all in.
Confiscate all weapons, and crime would go down. It made sense. It would have worked, too, if only there had been enough coppers ā say, three per citizen.
Amazingly, quite a few weapons were handed in. The flaw, though, was one that had somehow managed to escape Swing, and it was this: criminals donāt obey the law. Itās more or less a requirement for the job. They had no particular interest in making the streets safer for anyone except themselves. And they couldnāt believe what was happening. It was like Hogswatch every day.
Some citizens took the not-unreasonable view that something had gone a bit askew if only naughty people were carrying arms. And they got arrested in large numbers.
Claim things he doesnāt like are criminal acts, like carpooling, or eating pizza with your hands.
Probably this, except itāll be trans people or anyone that votes Democrat.
Easy, enforce the porn ban via lethal force.
Also, everything is porn now.
Iām very critical of the orange buffoon but I have to hand it to him about his interest in crime. In fact just the other day I heard he is very interested in the crime of raping childrenā¦
Not just interested, historically invested. Thereās a very, very good chance this man has raped kids.
Itās all in the Epstein Files that he wonāt release.
Investigation concludes that the streets of DC may need an influx of crack cocaine to reintroduce crime into the city
Interesting, the national guard is deployed throughout the city because of the high crime rate. I guess itās time to send them home and launch a congressional investigation while the media does round the clock coverage of āGuard Gateā.
Who knows donny maybe itāll distract people from the Epstein files, it wonāt, but maybe it will, either way donny boy you never know until you try!
If you want higher crime pay the criminals better!
Good discussion of the rationalization of a fascist play. Only one criticism:
But this investigation will become part of the pattern and practice of this administration filled with aspiring fascists.
Theyāre not aspiring. Theyāve sent in the military to take over a city from civilian control under a completely fabricated pretext with an underlying entirely political true purpose. Thatās not aspiring fascism, that is fascism.
Cops will even lie about how good and bad they are, depending on whoās asking. Letās keep this investigation going, maybe weāll find out who was part of that big child trafficking and rape super-group Trump was always hanging around with. Because heās a pedophile who rapes adults and children.
Back the Blue! But not the blue Blue. Just the red Blue.
It would help if you actually went to the areas that have high crime and not just where the cameras can see them. If this was about crime itās not like you donāt have the data to go find it.
Interesting that only Democratic leaders are capable of fudging their crime statistics. If weāre going to investigate DC, why not also investigate Dallas?
I bet whatever investigation they do will come up with a lot of cops that will be fired to showing an appropriate amount of restraint.
Next time thereās a race crime in some backwater county, we need to send the national guard in to patrol the county in response to the high crime rate there.
