Pretty horrible. Wife wants a divorce and is unwilling to try and fix things. Barely communicates with me at all.
I met my stepson when he was 9 months old. He’s 11 now. I’m the only father he knows. I’m devastated, because not only am I losing my wife, but I’m also losing my son, as I have no legal right to him. I’m estranged from the rest of my family, so the world is looking pretty cold and lonely from here.
If you have talked to a lawyer who has said that you have no legal right to see your stepson, it’s worth talking to a different lawyer. If you have not talked to a lawyer, talk to a lawyer ASAP. Specifically, a lawyer that’s at least familiar with the 4-part test in the Wisconsin Supreme Court case In re H.S.H-K. that shows a parent-like relationship. Even if you cannot afford to hire one to represent you, go for a one-time consultation.
Most states recognize that it’s bad for children to rip them away from people that are like parents to them, and courts will order visitation. Many state courts have adopted Wisconsin’s 4-part test, or have their own, similar doctrines. And these are strong arguments, with lots of jurisprudence behind them, that are worth raising in any divorce proceeding.
I’m not a lawyer, but I was a legal assistant at a family law firm. I saw too many men convinced that the courts were biased against fathers, so they didn’t even try to fight for their kids. The men who did try (even without a lawyer) generally got custody, placement, or visitation to stay connected to their kids. In one case that sticks with me, we won court-ordered placement for a man who found out that his daughter with his ex-girlfriend wasn’t his biological daughter after the ex wanted to cut him out of her life, and they did a paternity test. Even though they weren’t married, and he had no biological or legal connection to the child, the court recognized the parent-like relationship, and found that it was in her best interest to continue it.
I guess what I’m saying is, don’t conclude that you will lose your stepson unless and until a court says so.
I’m sorry to hear that, bro. Do you have any hobbies or interests you can focus on?
That’s a really awful situation. I hope things get better. Maybe she’ll change her mind in the future and let you at least spend some time with him.
I saw this and my first thought was: oh no Elmo, that’s not a great thing to ask the internet…
Elmo thinks it’s important to be careful on the internet and only ask appropriate questions. Elmo wants everyone to stay safe and have a positive online experience!
My almost-two-year-old dog is expected to die very suddenly from cancer at any time. She’s the sweetest thing. I’ve even felt guilty that I’ve thought she’s going to be a better dog (for me) than my older dog is, who is wonderful. But she’ll never have the chance.
Meanwhile, my husband can’t deal with the occasional accident her cancer is causing and is threatening not to get another dog, knowing full well that planning for the next dog is what keeps me going because my life is ruled by chronic health problems and I live for my dogs.
Edit: I guess the more succinct answer would be: Have you ever cried so hard you started to vomit?
My kitty died at 1.5y from something that wasn’t cancer, but the vet said it works like cancer. My heart aches for you. It took about a year to stop being sad and remember him being happy. I’m sure you’ve given your pup a good home. Enjoy what time you have left and you’ll eventually remember the happy times.
Thank you. That’s what I’m trying to do. She’s been very spoiled.
Fuck your husband right this minute. I’m so sorry about your puppy. And don’t feel bad, we all have the dog of our hearts.
Not too bad, but could be better.
A funny story about my not so great love life: just matched with a girl on Tinder which I managed to have engaging text discussions with and it felt quite genuine. This is rare for me, so I was happy about it.
Well, in the end it became obvious to me it was just a pig butchering romance scam when she started to talk about how she can help me invest in cryptocurrency.
I guess I’m going to be a failure in love life for a bit longer lol.
As long as you love yourself, you’re not a failure.
Thanks. I’m content with my own solitude, but I can admit the affirmation I got from this event felt nice, even though it was all stimulated.
Good that you figured it out though, and wasted their time.
A little better tonight now that I figured out that the problem with my server isn’t the $1000 motherboard, but a $40 stick of RAM.
My boyfriend is getting more and more frequent panic attacks. He’s at the end of his rope. I’m trying to get him therapy, but it took almost a year to convince him to let me sign him up for some. Today they contacted him to schedule an appointment…for a month from now. And he panicked about it so badly that he started sobbing at the end of his workday (while still at work).
He can’t afford therapy, so I offered to pay. Which makes him feel guilty. His constant anxiety is keeping him from getting help for his constant anxiety. It’s only going to get worse. And there’s nothing I can do about it.
I just realized I didn’t directly answer your question: terrible.
You’re doing a lot. Don’t let yourself tell you otherwise. My wife had lifelong GAD and panic disorder that was almost completely untreated for most of her life. Getting help wasn’t easy but, it has literally been life-changing. Getting him help IS also helping you as it is very stressful to be the partner of someone with untreated mental illness.
Make sure to give yourself care too. You can’t help if you’re driven to breakdown yourself. It’s hard and there are ups and downs but it will get better for both of you.
I’m doing pretty good right now. I feel like I’m better than I’ve been. How are you?
That’s great to hear! I’ve been doing okay, things have been up and down for me. Does Adam eat ass?
That’s a real philosophical question there.
Its sad that these types of posts are always accompanied by a waterfall of unwell people.
Everyone is sad and stressed out man, we deserve better.
On a strike. Early weekend is nice, but loosing money is not.
Hope your union succeeds!
I’m part of the management, so participation is voluntary. My union is not on strike, but is willing to support financially if one feels a need to participate.
Strike is political, so there is no specific group that would gain something.
Our current right wing gouvenment is on the leach of big corporations and is planning to severely neuter the union rights to strike. It’s gonna be a long spring.
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I’m…one of my big struggles is that I’m on a medication that reduces my appetite to almost nothing, and I eat almost nothing, and I’m enraging my SO by doing so. Everything tastes gross on this. The smell of my husband’s dinner right now is revolting. I can’t seem to get around it. Even junk food that I normally love tastes like wax and dust to me.
I absolutely have to be on it, but holy fuck it’s hard on my life.
This time last year I would’ve said something completely different but I’m confident to say I’m now doing well. Of course not the best but well
Honestly, I’d like to go to sleep right now. But otherwise, I’m excited and ready to fuckin’ go…after a good night’s sleep. Et tu, OP?
Great. I razzle dazzled a couple higher ranked people at work today, and the fruits were that I get to present one of my projects to the top tech brass at our company next week. My new phone arrived. And I have a 2 day LAN party coming up this weekend.
Small promotion for !casualconversation@lemmy.world where we have a weekly thread asking people how they are doing.
Also, I know it’s a Lemmy.world community, and they don’t have the best reputation among people on lemmy.ml, so if people would prefer to contribute if they community was hosted elsewhere, feel free to let me know, I’ll see if we can move it to a less divisive instance
