• SkaveRat
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    2 months ago

    Ive had a crush on you for a while

    Good start

    Are you down …

    hmm

    to get barebacked

    aaaand derailed

    • 𝕾𝖕𝖎𝖈𝖞 𝕿𝖚𝖓𝖆@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Hell, even “are you down…” isn’t bad. Suggested finishers:

      • …to get coffee?
      • …for a movie night?
      • …for lunch/dinner?
      • …to hang out and chat at the park?
      • …to meet at the library for a quick game of Cones of Dunshire?

      Basically anything but that.

    • MrJameGumb@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      I think the best part is that he asked almost like he was making a doctor’s appointment lol “are you available at 3pm on Thursday for some dehumanizing unprotected sex with a smelly neckbeard? No? Would Friday work better?”

    • snooggums@midwest.social
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      2 months ago

      …unless?

      Although it was in person instead of text, I did hook up with someone I knew from highschool with basically the same direct approach. It helped that I knew she would find it funny.

      • TriPolarBearz@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Plot twist: she has difficulty with reading comprehension and understanding modern slang. She actually would have been interested in casual unprotected sex with him. But anon stopped reading and didn’t clarify himself.

        • Rolando@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          Alternate plot twist: she really loves horseback riding and always wanted to try riding a horse without a saddle (i.e. “bare back”) but was a little nervous and wanted someone to help her with it. One day, she told herself, she would find the right person to “bareback” with.

          Then anon DMs her. “Yes,” she says, “I will bareback with you! meet me at the horse ranch.”

          Anon’s like “horse ranch? wtf” but goes for it. The fated hour arrives and anon rolls with it. they all live happily ever after.

    • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      Not sure I can believe any of the text because anon wasn’t immediately told to stay the fuck away or worse, and blocked.

      She doesnt need to know the exact meaning, “I’m into you and want to do x with/to you” is clear enough that anon has romantic or sexual intent.

      That anon got a not utterly revolted response to that hailmary is more an indication that the interest is mutual than not I’d say

    • Mango@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Honesty bad. Only good if you’re a good boy who don’t want no sex.

      • Serinus@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        It’s called tact. Maybe even basic social interaction. Also “to get barebacked”? How is that supposed to be appealing?

        Hey, guess what. I like girls, but if an attractive girl comes up to me and says, “want me to shove my clam in your face?” my answer is going to be “what the fuck is wrong with you.”

        • Mango@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          You see, if women were actually interested in men, that wouldn’t be a thing. Apparently 80% of them are not. If a girl comes asking me for the throne like that, it’s gonna depend on the girl. Looks clean and healthy? Aww yeah, I’m not busy! Maybe I’ll call for an STD test with that kind of attitude.

          • atomicorange@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Not everyone is that pathetic. Most of us actually want to interact with people and find out what they’re like before fucking them.

            • Mango@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              That only makes sense if you’re trying to have kids. Doesn’t matter for just sex. I would definitely recommend at least making sure they’re not the condom sabotage type. There’s nothing pathetic about casual sex. That mentality comes from jealousy. Go enjoy what you like. It doesn’t have to be that deep.

              • atomicorange@lemmy.world
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                2 months ago

                Lol not jealousy, just not so desperate I’d fuck anything that moves. I guess I can afford to have standards.

                • Mango@lemmy.world
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                  2 months ago

                  Your standards are just different from mine, and honestly kind of lame. I’d fuck anything that looks good and isn’t gonna make me sick or baby trap me. I’ve also got a standard for participation. Not interested in dead fish. Pretty high standards for looks and safety. Let me know how your ‘standards’ help your sex experience or how they’re even related.

          • kandoh@reddthat.com
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            2 months ago

            Women love sex, but there are social repercussions for women that enjoy sex and ‘give it up’ easy. Also, as the physically weaker partner they often don’t get to have the sort of sex they want to be having, instead having to lay there and get violently rammed into for 5 minutes.

              • kandoh@reddthat.com
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                2 months ago

                Than your issue is your potential sexual selection is an unnaturally small number for the same societal reasons

                • Mango@lemmy.world
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                  2 months ago

                  Why are you acting like I have an issue? I am fine. You all have hangups here.

          • Taleya@aussie.zone
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            2 months ago

            You see, if women were actually interested in men

            Oh we’re definitely interested in men. Your experiences otherwise are solely to do with your personality, not your gender

            • Mango@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              I’m not referring to my experiences, but a poll I heard about.

              Good luck with thinking you’re gonna make me feel bad.

          • boonhet@lemm.ee
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            2 months ago

            Incel pretty much already means that.

            Cringe moment is that when I was like 16 or 17, I too, identified with being an incel - I mean, I WAS INvoluntarily CELibate. So I browsed their subreddit for a while.

            I quickly realized that those were guys who were not just involuntarily celibate. They all hated women.

            • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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              2 months ago

              It’s odd to me how you start by saying ‘incel = woman hater’, then showcase having the self awareness to recognize being involuntarily celibate without hating women, then loop back around to ‘incel = woman hater’.

              • WldFyre@lemm.ee
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                2 months ago

                There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin, but the term incel has more connotations than “involuntary celebrate.”

              • boonhet@lemm.ee
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                2 months ago

                It’s just that they’ve adopted the label.

                You could say you’re a fan of national socialism, but when you realize what people who refer to themselves as national socialists are, I don’t think you’ll want to use that label on yourself anymore.

            • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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              2 months ago

              What’s the implication here? They’re an incel because they hate women or they hate women because they’re an incel?

              • AVincentInSpace@pawb.social
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                2 months ago

                The first one. There are a few exceptions, but overwhelmingly, incels are dudes who act like they are owed sex and call women “females” and then are surprised when none want to sleep with them

                • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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                  2 months ago

                  For one thing, there are plenty of female incels. For another, every male incel I’ve met does not hate women. I game online and have quite a few of them for friends. I think that conflating ‘incel’ and ‘hates women’ is morally repugnant.

                  The English language actually has the perfect word for what you want to say, and that’s ‘mysogynist’. Use your words correctly.

  • unexposedhazard
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    2 months ago

    Anon got a reply, thats would have been a good start, but no… He had to be horny brained.

  • loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works
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    2 months ago

    Could in theory be saved later by “Sorry, this message was inappropriate, if it’s any excuse I was drunk when I sent it.” If feeling confident, could be followed by “The part about having a crush on you was true tho.”.

  • NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone
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    2 months ago

    I don’t understand why a nice young man who uses “femoid” as a word can’t get a girlfriend. One of life’s little mysteries!

  • nucleative@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    The class clown kid from my high school (looked like a clown too) ended up with a smoking hot wife, seemingly way out of his league.

    Around high school I can remember him asking and being rejected by just about every girl.

    Only reason I can think of is he got so used to rejection that he was completely unphased to keep going and the numbers game eventually worked out for him.

    Good on him and a lesson for the rest of us, lol.

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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    2 months ago

    This is why honesty is important.

    Had anon faked his way through things and lied about his intentions, it would have been worse for both of them.

    Yah, I know, it’s fake, but there’s an underlying truth that honesty is better for this kind of thing.

    Yes, you will absolutely get shot down 99% of the time (and add .9 to that a lot to get closer to reality), but that’s the entire point. You tell someone you want to fuck them, and they can choose based on their own needs and wants. When those align, awesome! Woot for fucking!

    Now, should you be an absolute cretin about it? No. There’s a difference between being honest and ignoring established social norms regarding language. Currently, asking if someone wants to get barebacked is considered rude, even if they’re DTF. You ask with respect and manners. “Hi, random acquaintance, this is anon, I think you’re attractive, and have for a long time. I would very much like to get together for sex, is that something you might be interested in too?”

    Now, again, most of the time you’ll be lucky to not get told to fuck yourself. But that’s still better than faking other forms of interest to try and get sex.

    And yes, I have actually asked someone that I already knew if they would be interested in at least a one time sexual encounter. And it worked one time. I’ve asked other people and it didn’t work. Since I’m a fucking balding sasquatch in looks, and I was poor as fuck at the time, it wasn’t some kind of artificial thing that incels like to blame for their failures.

    Be real. Be up front. Be polite. But also be willing to accept the large amount of noes you’ll get with aplomb.