• qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website
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      5 months ago

      Property can take a while to close — offer to title in under 30 days is on the quick side.

      Of course, you could probably close very fast if you offered 100M cash on a 10M property…

      • Baphomet_The_Blasphemer@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        If you’re buying vacant land and paying cash, you can close really quickly as there’s nothing in need of inspection, and loan processing times aren’t a factor… I have a buddy who just purchased 100+ acres of vacant land from a logging company. He paid cash and was able to close in just a few weeks.

        • Omgpwnies@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          yeah, usually closing time is just buffer time for people to get their affairs in order, move out, inspections, lawyer stuff, etc. If you offer straight up cash and pay a boatload to the lawyers to get the paperwork done up ASAP, you can close likely within a couple weeks

    • MNByChoice@midwest.social
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      5 months ago

      In “Bewster’s Millions” he also had to have nothing of value at the end.

      So yes that is a good method for this formula of the question.

  • brown567@sh.itjust.works
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    5 months ago

    Easy! Just spend the month in a US hospital without insurance

    Hopefully the billion will cover the rest of the bill

  • ditty@lemm.ee
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    5 months ago

    Sent this to my friend at AWS and he said it was already all-over their internal Memes Slack channel. At least their engineers and project managers are in on the joke. 😁

  • slazer2au@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Create a serverless function on AWS that calls a serverless function on Azure, which calls a serverless function on gcp which calls a serverless function on Oracle cloud which loops it back to AWS.

    Now stick CloudFlare in between each step of that.

  • DrDominate@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Genie never said they’d give me a 100M to spend in the first place. No way I’d be able to spend 100M that I don’t have.

    • Miaou@jlai.lu
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      5 months ago

      Find someone rich who would believe you have this pact with a génie, and promise them a 100% ROI.

      Thinking of it, that’s not the worst idea for a new sect religion…

    • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 months ago

      First get the spending money then do it. In a non-refundable unable to be altered manner (ignoring the magicially manifesting money part)

    • eldain@feddit.nl
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      5 months ago

      Or worse if he does, how do you prove to all the anti-money-laundering watchdogs you got free money from a genie? Will you be able to gain control over your instantly conviscated money in 30 days?

  • AstralPath@lemmy.ca
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    5 months ago

    I’d spend 100M in a month easily. Especially after I’ve bankrolled GrapheneOS, Ladybird and all my favourite FOSS projects. They also didn’t say anything about charity which IMO isn’t gifting. Once I feel like I’ve sufficiently contributed to society I’d buy a 50ft sailboat, pimp the shit out of it with solar and fuck off forever.

    With the billion I’d establish a fund that pays out monthly to any projects I deem worthy and funds all food banks in my local area indefinitely.

    • Jolteon@lemmy.zip
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      5 months ago

      Then maybe graphene OS would be able to get enough people to maintain non-pixel builds.

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      Especially after I’ve bankrolled GrapheneOS, Ladybird and all my favourite FOSS projects.

      According to the book The Starfish and the Spider, which is about decentralized organization versus centralized organization, the Spanish Empire was able to defeat the previously-undefeatable Apache resistance by giving gifts of horses to some of the Apache leaders. It provided them status, creating a hierarchy, turning the Apache society into the sort of thing that could be destroyed in conventional battle.

      Not saying it’s a very tight analogy, but I would be wary of changes in team culture resulting from a project going from volunteer based to well-funded.

      Obviously open source projects need resources, such as servers and github accounts and all that, but spirits change when resource flows change, and projects excel or flub on spirit.

  • Stern@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    “Can I invest in crypto”

    “I already said no throwing it away”

    • Makeitstop@lemmy.world
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      It’s taking the premise of Brewster’s Millions, which required that he not only spend the money, but that he has to have nothing left at the end, including assets. So, buying a house doesn’t work because you still own the house.

      Obviously there are still plenty of ways to drop millions on stuff without having anything to show for it. Hell, it’s probably easier now than ever before. Just become a whale for a mobile game and you’re there.

        • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          Well if taking the rules literally, that’s allowed too!

          As long as you resist whatever urge you might have to throw out the ashes before you get the billion, you’re not throwing them away!

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            5 months ago

            I wanna say they specifically called out property destruction as being against the rules. And overpaying as well iirc, so you can’t offer someone millions for a sandwich that you then eat.

            Plus, if we’re being pedantic, burning the money isn’t spending it, which is what he is supposed to do.

            The movie also has the advantage of having a contract that presumably covers any other loopholes the audience thinks of, but which they don’t explicitly address in the script. Once you take it out of a movie and start treating it like a challenge to be solved, you can no longer hide behind some unseen fine print.

            • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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              they specifically called out property destruction as being against the rules

              Not in this meme, which is what I’m referring to.

              And overpaying as well

              So that rules out spending them in the US and several other countries…

              In under-regulated capitalism, prices aren’t set at what’s fair, they’re at the maximum that they can get away with without losing too many sales/clients.

              That’s by definition overpaying from the perspective of the buyer/client.

              Plus, if we’re being pedantic

              We are indeed. Carry on, good sir/madam/cuttlefish

              burning the money isn’t spending it, which is what he is supposed to do.

              Damn, you got me there. Good point 😁

              The movie

              Again, I was referring to the meme only, not the movie that inspired the premise

              also has the advantage of having a contract that presumably covers any other loopholes the audience thinks of

              That’s a mountain sized presumption…

              Once you take it out of a movie and start treating it like a challenge to be solved, you can no longer hide behind some unseen fine print.

              Good. Genies have had it too good for too long 😛

      • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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        5 months ago

        Mobile game, uhg! Think of the services: a month’s worth of the best eats: 90 meals from the world’s 100 most famous chefs, each flown in to serve you. (Presumably 10% would decline even $1m for a single meal.) Concerts from semi-famous bands every three nights. Boom, $100m spent!

        Mobile games are easier and funnier though 😉

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    I would’ve thought that this could be quite simple.

    • A few flights in a private jet, or long-term purchasing for the whole month to take you wherever you want.
    • Several $250k-500k cars in each location to take you wherever you want
    • A private show from a famous band can set you back a few million. Do this each day.
    • Go to Vegas and get in a pissing content with some rich cunt where you send expensive drinks to each others table, until one folds. That’ll be a few million each night.
    • Trump spent a ton on sex, so high class hookers?
    • A few ads across multiple providers to promote something
    • Prize fights can be set up quickly, and have the best in combat sports ready in 30 days. Offer $1m per division for the winner, and do it across maybe 4-5 sports, pay for TV and streaming, set up a venue, and you’ll probably blow through it all.
    • garbagebagel@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      I would spend all 100M to get ads put up all over the country of people who have wronged me and my loved ones. They’ll just be like really awful pictures of them with really petty captions like “doesn’t help carry suitcases”, “laughed at a disabled person”, “sneezed too loud that one time”. That’ll show them.

      • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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        5 months ago

        The lead times on aircraft manufacturing is measured in years though. It’s so bad that in many cases airlines will lease aircraft from other airlines to the point that it’s all meaningless

          • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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            5 months ago

            Honestly modern finance brings us to a point where you really have to ask what the criteria is to actually “spend” the money, given how many businesses that exist purely moving numbers around on spreadsheets and not actually doing anything tangible in the real world

  • win95@lemmy.zip
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    5 months ago

    Easy. Buy 100 homes in my city. Become a landlord. Barely ask rent so it’s technically not gifting. Use my infinite money to maintain the homes so people have affordable decent housing. Profit for all!

      • buddascrayon@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        They said $100,000,000 not $100,000. With $100 million you could start 10 companies easily and still end up profitable if even one of them hits paydirt.

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    Can I do the lobbying thing to get a nice human rights or climate law passed or is 100M still too poor for that