Moldy Monday continues.

  • squirrel@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 month ago

    The “”“alpha male’s”“” masculinity is so fragile, they threw a conniption when seeing a picture of a fit woman.

    • uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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      1 month ago

      I have a personal hypothesis that self-proclaimed alpha [males] may feel the same gender dysphoria that trans folk do, only it is the sensation that they present less masculine than they actually do, so in their effort to attaining a little bit of machismo they go way overboard.

      It’s similar I think to the way Donald Trump can be President of the United States, and still feel fragile and unworthy.

      • Windex007@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Lol, so if I’m hearing you right, people who yap endlessly about “being alpha” are “beta to alpha trans”?

        • BellyPurpledGerbil@sh.itjust.works
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          I do think there is some element of gender disillusionment if not dysphoria in very insecure men. I don’t think calling them some stage of trans has the right implications though. They are men that want to stay men. But their internal views of men are constantly challenged by their culture and environment.

          Nothing says women can’t have muscular bodies or else they must be men or being a woman wrong in some way. But that dissonance obviously irritates the type of guy that unironically wants to be an alpha gigachad. So they impose their own standards on others, unknowingly outing their insecurities.

          If I’m being really honest though even if I thought all of that was likely, it’s way more likely that people on the Internet just love to start flame wars about anything if they’re bored enough. Especially when the target is a woman.

          • Windex007@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            I think an argument could be made that since gender is a social construct anyways, the idea of “alpha”, “beta”, and “sigma” males are different genders.

            • lady_scarecrow (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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              1 month ago

              I’ll just copy-paste what I said last time:

              The idea that gender is entirely socially constructed is easily the greatest misconception about gender that gets repeated time and again – almost always by cis people, who never think too much about it because they’ve never had to reconsider their own gender.

              Gender roles and gender stereotypes really are socially constructed, like the idea that some clothes are feminine and others are masculine, just to name one example. Gender identity, however, is not. If that was true, like the previous commenter was saying, conversion therapy for trans people would work, when it’s been shown it absolutely doesn’t. Gender dysphoria isn’t a social construct either. Many trans people see their own lives improve considerably after taking HRT (hormone therapy) and having gender-affirming surgeries – how can that be explained socially? Also, we know there is a genetic component to being trans as well, because of twin studies. All of which shows there really is a biological component to gender – just not in the “gender = genitals” way that transphobes think.

              • squirrel@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                1 month ago

                Your quote reminds me of one of the biggest misconceptions about Judith Butler’s work who wrote so much about gender…

                People constantly misquote them and say that Butler wrote that “gender is a performance” and assume that Butler meant that gender is fake.

                What Butler Butler actually wrote is that “gender is performative”, ie. it involves a performance that communicates our gender identity to others without the performance being the end-all-be-all of gender.

              • Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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                1 month ago

                I’m gonna guess you get push-back on this, depending on how you’ve phrased it before, because saying gender is not a construct is a strong/radical statement in the context of theory.

                I imagine your point is that, for an individual, gender is not some arbitrary choice. It is very real. I agree. That is consistent with the idea of finding oneself on a dynamic gender spectra that is collectively defined; i.e., a social construct.

                The people who try to deny an individual’s gender, who they are, by using social construct as a synonym for “not real,” do not understand the term and, more importantly, will always find some other reason to do so until they learn to be better people. That is, the term itself is not to blame.

                • lady_scarecrow (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                  1 month ago

                  saying gender is not a construct is a strong/radical statement in the context of theory

                  To be clear, I’m saying gender identity isn’t a social construct (gender roles definitely are). And that’s hardly a radical statement given that there is a genetic factor to being trans, as evidenced by e.g. twin studies like this one which found a much higher amount of cases where both twins are trans among identical twins (who have the same genetic code) than non-identical twins. Also, like I mentioned before, a lot of trans people feel considerable relief to their own gender dysphoria upon seeking hormone therapy and gender-affirming surgeries, which is quite hard to explain on a social basis.

              • Windex007@lemmy.world
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                Why does gender identity being a social construct mean conversation therapy would work? I don’t follow the logic behind that assertion.

                I see no reason why you can’t be biologically predisposed to identify as things that are socially constructed.

                • lady_scarecrow (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                  1 month ago

                  The rationale that many people follow is that if gender is socially constructed, it can be socially changed as well (through conversion therapy) to make your kid align with their assigned gender at birth, which doesn’t work in reality.

              • Match!!@pawb.social
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                1 month ago

                hey! the idea that gender is entirely socially constructed is also advanced by agender enbys like young me who simply never experienced a feeling of gender in their lives, and thus agreed with fellow enby Judith Butler that gender is a funny silly game we play for no reason. do not go around presuming those people are cisgender or that everyone biologically feels gender like you do

                • lady_scarecrow (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                  I can see why this idea would seem appealing to agender people. But that’s taking one’s personal case and turning it into a statement about gender as a whole. Gender having a biological component isn’t at odds with agender or NB people, but claiming gender is socially constructed is indeed problematic, like I said before.

      • mindbleach@sh.itjust.works
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        1 month ago

        That’s toxic masculinity in a nutshell. See also the author of The Game describing sex in the most mechanical terms - coming reeeal close to acknowledging he does not actually desire women sexually, he’s just conditioned to see them as a goal.

      • glilimith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 month ago

        I’m pretty sure it’s dysmorphia rather than dysphoria. Dysphoria is rooted in an accurate picture of yourself and dysmorphia in an inaccurate one. If a guy starts going to the gym because the idea of not being able to bridal carry his girlfriend makes him feel unmanly, I’d agree that’s some flavor of gender dysphoria. On the other hand, someone like the liver king thinking he still doesn’t have enough muscle is definitely body dysmorphia.

        But I’d agree that (similar to dysphoria) the so-called alphas often have dysmorphia of more than just the body - they worry they come across unmanly in all ways of their presentation, regardless of how much “masculine energy” they’re already putting out.

      • Tiltinyall@beehaw.org
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        1 month ago

        This is an understatement. History tells many tales that have passed through the ages that men in this instance have still not learned.

      • Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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        1 month ago

        Yeah this is a favorite pet theory of mine as well, partly because I like imagining guys like Andrew Tate protesting being labeled “trans alpha” or whatever, but also because it’s just a fact that many cis people experience a form of gender dysphoria and commonly seek hormone therapy for it at early ages.

        I’ve found that comparison usually clicks with uninitiated cis people immediately, even when they’ve only heard othering and alarmist narratives up to that point.

    • norimee@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I guess, because its very hard for biological women to get abs like that. The muscles are just different. Not impossible, but way, way harder then for men and therefore quite rare.

      And we all know, its very scary for bigots to even look at trans people. They might have to wash their eyes with soap now.

      • SorryforSmelling@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 month ago

        just wanna add that it is easier to get them with testosterone. i think it makes sense to make that distinction here since there are literal cis women body builder who take it as performance enhancing drugs.

        • norimee@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          Interesting. I wasn’t sure if it gets harder for trans women, when they are on estrogen. Do they loose the abs?

          • SorryforSmelling@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            1 month ago

            depends on the order. if you build abs on testosterone (t) then go on estrogen (e) then you just can with relatively easily upkeep them. if you went on e before working out, its just as hard as for cis women. so hardcore cis women body builder go on t for a short time (some weeks) to get big muscles easier before retuning to e.

            • garbagebagel@lemmy.world
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              1 month ago

              I’m gonna ask for t for totally cis reasons now. I’m definitely a body builder and absolutely not an 🥚.

              • megopie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                1 month ago

                So, it’s not exactly easily available for workout purposes, but, much like antibiotics, aquarium and fish farm suppliers are not bound by the normal laws of pharmaceuticals but are bound by food safety to make sure the stuff is pure and uncontaminated.

                (source: I have family who work in fish farming)

      • QualifiedKitten@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        I think it’s less that the muscles are different, and more about body fat percentage and maybe distribution. You could have the strongest core in the world, but if there’s a layer of fat on top of your abs, they won’t have this visible definition.

        Also… Really rare to have boobs that big AND such low body fat, but all sorts of women get implants.

      • DaGeek247@fedia.io
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        1 month ago

        I thought it was just regular old sexism; woman getting stronk has the men with fragile egos feeling scared.

        • hedgehog@ttrpg.network
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          1 month ago

          I interpreted “biological” in this context to refer to women who’ve been impacted by the difference i hormones, i.e., a cis woman with average amounts of estrogen / testosterone would qualify, as would a trans woman who has been on estrogen for a couple years. Sort of a “people for whom the following statement is relevant” kind of an adjective.

      • GarfGirl [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zoneM
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        1 month ago

        In future I’d advise using the term cis woman instead of biological woman because biological woman has a history of being used as a transphobic term by TERFs to delegitimise trans people, especially in the UK.

        • norimee@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          Yeah, I wasn’t sure about how to differentiate it. English is not my natural language.

          I disagree about using “cis” in this context though. I wasn’t sure how much of the effects are hormonal and if it is the same for trans men. And its also true for non binary and genderfluid persons. So cis seemed to exclude many.

          I got curious and looked into it and there were some helpful comments too. It turns out it’s mostly about the estrogen. So this means cis women, xx-chomosome non binary and gender fluid people (as long as they are not substituting hormons), trans women on estrogen and trans men who do not substitute testosterone.

          So that would mean instead of “biological women” it would be “hormonal female” I guess, or what is the correct for that?

    • Che Banana@beehaw.org
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      1 month ago

      sweaty 6 pack made their pants tight, and monkey brain confused as only men should have 6 pack abs…ergo they may have caught the gay

    • laughterlaughter@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I don’t find abs in women attractive. But if women want to have them, and others want to admire them, who am I to stop them?

      • JovialMicrobial@lemm.ee
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        1 month ago

        If more people had this attitude towards harmless things that don’t suit their tastes we’d live in a far less hostile world. Thanks for being a decent person!

      • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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        1 month ago

        I find abs in women damn attractive. Actually surprised me as I didn’t used to. I think something in me changed on my own journey which has made me respect and admire the qualities that lead to their abs more than it being a superficial “that looks good”.

    • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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      1 month ago

      Because the woman makes an effort to take care of herself and it makes them feel shitty about being lazy.

    • Lad@reddthat.com
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      1 month ago

      Some guys feel emasculated when they can’t make a beautiful woman like them. So the only way they can feel like they’ve taken some power back is to belittle and talk down beautiful women.

      • TurtleJoe@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Because they can choose whose peepee, if any, that they want to touch. And yes, they choose not to touch said podcaster.

    • Pero@lemm.ee
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      1 month ago

      Because they are afraid she’d absolutely dominate them? Freaking AlPHa MalEs.

  • Kaityy@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 month ago

    drooling, sweating, crying, moaning, throwing up, flying, levitating, spinning, turning inside out, achieving enlightenment, …

    cat speaking into microphone, caption "would"

  • umbrella@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    the west IS indeed falling, just not for the reasons the chud podcaster types think it is.

    the irony of it is that its probably more to do with the aforementioned podcasters than with [shuffles cards] women who go to the gym.

    • megopie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      I think the podcasts are a more a symptom of people attempting to rationalize how real issues are the fault of anything but the systems they are personally invested in.

  • TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com
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    What is so crazy is that a lot of these folks look up to Sparta because of its dedication to physical conditioning. But of the people that traveled to Sparta we know that they wrote of watching the women of Sparta exercise because they were known to be strong, fast, and beautiful because of their exercise and physical conditioning was expected of them even as slave owning elites.

    This person should be lauded for their dedication to conditioning and feared for their ability to Kegel a steel girder asunder. And they probably don’t even own one slave outright so it is even that more amazing.

    • laughterlaughter@lemmy.world
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      Because it looks manly.

      It’s like when they show a man with perfectly round manboobs. Something primal in me would say “I’d motorboard those!”

        • LaLuzDelSol@lemmy.world
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          Testosterone. I mean as a straight guy I love strong women but like, there is definitely a correlation between testosterone and muscle mass.

          • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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            1 month ago

            Scientifically yes, but it is society that has taught us to dislike muscular women. And frankly I love this look on a woman, it tells me about her values…values I find damn attractive.

  • fossilesque@mander.xyz
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    1 month ago

    I miss being fit. Muscle mommies are underrated. All the endorphins. First thing I’m going to do off a grad student salary is get a personal trainer. Fitness makes me feel normal and happy. I lost my six pack here, foo.

    • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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      1 month ago

      If I may ask, what stopped you? Because being fit isn’t only for the rich…you can do bodyweight and still be damn fit!

      • fossilesque@mander.xyz
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        1 month ago

        I tripped on stairs and my foot got stuck on carpet staples during apt rennovations. They can’t find what happened to the soft tissue yet, it is still purple on the side. I can walk and even hike a bit but I really feel it later. I didnt break anything, my foot was stronger than most from sports, so I basically got really bad turf toe plus something is damaged mechanically. It throws off my balance a bit too, otherwise I’d be doing yoga. They thought it would heal but it’s not… It’s been a few years of waiting and trying different things and tests; but I have a specialist seeing me in a few months if they don’t reschedule again (the healthcare here is great, just not enough workers)…

        That being said I hate, hate, hate the gym, it feels too voyeuristic and crowded. I’d rather be outside doing something fun. I know I’ll go if I’m paying for a trainer. If all else fails I’ll get a little Pelican kayak or find a heated pool in the next place I live and do my thing when I’m not worried about money haha.

        I will say that feeling your muscles atrophy is fucking wild. Fortunately my partner is a trained masseuse that has worked on a lot of athletes!! :)

        • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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          1 month ago

          Hope you get to the bottom of it soon!

          Sounds like you still have lots of options for maintaining fitness:

          • pretty much any upper body exercises
          • bodyweight single-leg squats?
          • if you can get to a cheap gym you’ve got a myriad of resistance machines available they don’t need balance etc…but maybe cost is an issue.

          Anyway I’m sure you’ve thought of all of this - just know this one stranger wants you to be able to lead a healthier life soon!

          • fossilesque@mander.xyz
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            1 month ago

            I’m going to be honest: I will not do any of that lol. It does not keep my brain busy therefore, it doesn’t happen. I’ve got that internal ADHD.

        • Liz@midwest.social
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          Bruh, I got stuck in bed for a few years and the first few months were so weird, feeling my knee joints becoming less stable thanks to less muscular support.

        • Vik@lemmy.world
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          I can understand not being into commercial gyms for a variety of reasons. Would you be open to a home fitness setup (given the space etc)

            • Vik@lemmy.world
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              I feel this (south east england). I’m fortunate enough to have a little space in my garage for a half rack, incline bench, Olympic gear and accessories. I got into the idea of how little equipment (and floorspace) you can get by with for a comprehensive setup, it sort of became a little research project over the pandemic.

              In the interim, I stumbled across some excellent body weight exercises that can be performed with minimal equipment (piston/pistol squat, Nordic and reverse Nordic curl, single leg hip thrust, handstand press, etc). I was most surprised to find out how well you could train your legs without additional gear. A set of resistance bands and a pair of small dumbbells can go a very long way

              • fossilesque@mander.xyz
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                I won’t do it regularly myself because it is boring. That is why I need to pay someone to force me; otherwise, it is another chore I do not enjoy. and am not keeping up with. I would waste far less money seeing a trainer for a bit. I also need to be very careful of old disc injuries in my spine so I am leery to do lifting without a trainer. I have a plan, I am almost done. :)

                • Vik@lemmy.world
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                  1 month ago

                  That’s understandable. I have a close friend who feels very much the same way. Their approach to fitness is far more functional than mine (rock climber), and he gets a great deal of enjoyment from it.

        • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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          That being said I hate, hate, hate the gym, it feels too voyeuristic and crowded. I’d rather be outside doing something fun. I know I’ll go if I’m paying for a trainer. If all else fails I’ll get a little Pelican kayak or find a heated pool in the next place I live and do my thing when I’m not worried about money haha.

          I also have a hard time going to the gym. I bought a set of adjustable dumbbells so I can just work out at home. They even have a bar that screws in between them to make it into a barbell (I don’t have a rack to really load it up safely but it’s still useful). Since I got those my workout schedule has stayed pretty consistent. It seems the “having to go somewhere” part was what was always tripping me up before.

      • Chuymatt@beehaw.org
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        1 month ago

        Dood, Have you done grad school for the sciences? Man, my last 2 years had me hunched over researching/working for 60hr a week minimum, then the study and class time.

        • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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          I don’t know what grad school is - I have a masters degree in astrophysics and I have to say it required nothing like what you’ve described, so I suspect you’re aiming for a PhD or something?

          Balancing life and fitness can be very challenging these days, especially the kind of commitment required to achieve the lean and strong body shown here.

          Good luck in your studies, I hope you find time for a healthier lifestyle soon!

          BTW- the original poster mentioned the affordability, not the time issue. Hence why I said what I did.

  • capital@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    More muscle mommies please.

    Edit: realized this is a lgbtq group… I’m a straight dude and love this pic.